Retarded Jokes / Recent Jokes

A new report from the Pentagon classifies homosexuality as a mental disorder, in the same class as retarded. Homosexuality responds: it takes one to know one. Bitch.

After Christmas break, a teacher asked her young pupils to write an essay about how they spent their holidays. One small boy wrote the following:
We always used to spend Christmas with Grandpa and Grandma. They used to live here in a big brick home, but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Florida. Now they live in a place with a lot of other retarded people. They all live in little tin boxes. They ride on three-wheeled tricycles and they all wear name tags, because they don't know who they are.
They go to a big building called a wrecked hall, but if it was wrecked, they got it fixed because it is alright now. They play games and do exercises there, but they don't do them very good. There is a swimming pool there. They go in it and just stand there with their hats on. I guess they don't know how to swim.
As you go into their park, there is a doll house with a little man sitting in it. He watches all day so they can't get out without him seeing them. When they can sneak more...

There was a retarded duck farmer who had 2 sons, but only enough money to send one to college. So he came up with a fair way to choose who was to get the money. He called both of his sons into a room and gave them each a retarded duck and instructed them to go into the city. The one who made the most off the duck would win the money for college. Well the first child, being the good child he was, scurried off to sell his duck. As he was walking, he saw a lady mowing her lawn. She jumped up from the mower and screamed, "IS THAT A RETARDED DUCK?!?" It sure is he replyed, and its for sale too! She said that she collected retarded ducks and would gladly pay him $10 for that duck, he agreed. Well the other son being the "bad" kid went strait for the whore house. When he got there, a lady started hittin on him. He said he'd love to fuck her but he doesnt have any money, just this retarded duck. She thought about it for awhile and said, well I always did want a pet. So more...

Similarities BRA and BAR
Both are drinking joints. Both have restriction time on closing and opening timings Both are flashy. When open, both drive men mad.
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Why women wear undergarments with flowers printed on them?
To pay tribute to men who got buried under them
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Why was the sardar arrested in the political rally?
Because he saw a lady journalist going with a badge on her chest which said' PRESS' and he did
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There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencils in a box.
The Female pencil got pregnant! !
Which Male pencil is responsible?
THE ONE WITHOUT THE RUBBER
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Three Roosters: normal, retarded and a gay.
Normal: cock-a-doodle-dooo! !!
Retarded: doodle-cock-a-dooo! !!
Gay: any-cock-will more...

1. There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencil in a box. The Female pencil got pregnant!! Which Male pencil is responsible?
THE ONE WITHOUT THE RUBBER.
2. Woman in bed with husband's best friend, phone rings!' YES'.. OK, BYE'.
She turns to her lover and says, THAT'S MY HUBBY, SAYS HE'S NOW GOLFING WITH YOU.
3. Three Roosters: normal, retarded and a gay.
Normal: cock-a-doodle-dooo! !!
Retarded: doodle-cock-a-dooo! !!
Gay: any-cock-will dooo! !!
4. Three Guys were introduced to a girl.
Hi,.... I'm Peter, not a SAINT.
I'm Paul not a POPE.
I'm John not a BAPTIST...
The girl replied.. Hi.. I'm Mary, not a VIRGIN.
5. Girlfriends are appetizers. Taste good at any time.
Mistresses are Tomyams. Hot and spicy. Eaten frequently.
WIVES are Maggie. Eaten when there's nothing to eat.!!!
6. Income Tax office asked a Prostitute, why she puts her occupation as CHICKEN FARMER.
She replied: I RAISED 5, 000 COCKS LAST more...