Rocky Jokes / Recent Jokes

A sixty-year-old Sylvester Stallone stars in "Rocky Balboa", the sixth movie in the series. In this atmosphere of sequels to long-resting franchises, moviegoers can also look forward to "Die Hard IV: Dying of Prostate Cancer," and "Ghostbusters 3," in which the aging Ghostbusters return to Manhattan, only to discover that gentrification has pushed all the supernatural phenomena to Astoria.

"Commandments 11-20: Moses Strikes Back"

"Three Men and a Sheep"

"Rocky 10: Rocky Fights Irregularity"

"Police Academy IX: Beating A Dead Horse"

"Babe II: Side of Bacon"

"Showgirls 2001: A Silicone Odyssey"

"Dumbo: First Blood"

"Waterworld 2: The Red Ink Sea"

"Eliminating Raoul"

"Home Alone 4: Under House Arrest"

"Dead Man Rotting"

"Driving Miss Daisy's Hearse"

"Pee Wee's Felonious Adventure"

"Lawrence of Bolivia"

"Kickboxer 3: Right in the Groin!"

"Weekend At Bernie's 3: Starting to Reek"

"To Kung Fu, Thanks For Everything, David Carradine"

"CoDependence Day"

"The Englishman Who Drove Into L.A. a Hugh and more...

Rocky the rooster was the biggest, meanest rooster you ever saw.
He spent his time beating the crap out of all the animals in the farm yard.
One day he picked on the farm cat, but the cat turned around and beat Rocky to a pulp.
The moral of the story....
No matter how big the cock is, the pussy can always take it !!!

The sixth Rocky movie opens tomorrow with a 60-year-old Rocky Balboa taking on the heavyweight champ for the purse – which doubtless contains several Mylanta, some Poligrip, and a Depends.

This is an Actual Article from the Los Angeles Times:
"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying
to retrieve the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told bemused doctors in the Severe
Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomasszewski, and his homosexual
partner Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after
a felching session had gone seriously wrong.
"I pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped Raggot, our gerbil, in,"
he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon', my cue that he'd had
enough. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he wouldn't come out again, so I peered
into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him." At a
hushed press conference a hospital spokesperson described what happened next.
"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot out the
tubing, igniting Mr. Tomaszewski's hair more...