Rolls Jokes / Recent Jokes

One afternoon this guy drives down a highway to visit a nearby lake and relax. On his way to the lake, a guy dressed from head to toe in red standing on the side of the highway gestures for him to stop. The guy rolls down the window and says, "How can I help you?" "I am the red jerk of the highway. You got something to eat?" With a smile in his face, the guy hands a sandwich to the guy in red and drives away. Not even five minutes later, he comes across another guy. This guy is dressed fully in yellow, standing on the side and waving for him to stop. A bit irritated, our guy stops, cranks down the window, and says, "What can I do for you?" "I am the yellow jerk of the highway. You got something to drink?" Hardly managing to smile this time, he hands the guy a can of Coke and stomps on the pedal and takes off again. In order to make it to the lakeside before sunset, he decides to go faster and not stop no matter what. To his frustration, he sees more...

There once was a priest who loved to golf. He was pretty good at it and had two nuns as an entourage who would follow him around and watch him play. One Saturday the priest was shooting a great round, when he came upon the eighth hole. He started off with a beautiful drive to down the fareway, and a nice chip to the green. When he goes to putt the ball it rolls straight for the hole, swerves, misses rolls down the hill and into the lake. The priest enraged by this flub in an otherwise perfect round takes out his sand wedge, bends it over his knee, and hurls it at a tree. He then screams at the top of his lungs:
"GODDAMNIT, I missed!"
The two nuns are shocked and berate him saying, "You shouldn't swear or GOD will get you."
The priest, a little abashed decides to continue his round. Amazingly, he finds that his game is improving. However when he gets to the thirteenth hole he drives a wicked slice into the water hazard, takes his penalty and winds up more...

"Is there chicken in your vegetarian gumbo?" - Asked of a waitress.
"Just the chicken." - The response a waitress gave when asked if there were any dairy products in a soup.
"Would you like cream and sugar with that?" - Asked by a waitress when a customer specified orange juice instead of coffee as part of a breakfast meal.
"Do you want cheese on that?" - Asked when a customer ordered a plain cheeseburger.
"You want fries with that?" - Asked when a customer ordered an apple turnover.
"Do you want onions on that?" - A waitress, in response to a couple ordering a milk shake and a large cola.
"Is there any meat in the veggie rolls?"
"Do you get rice with your fried rice?"
"I'm sorry, we only have six inch and foot long subs." - A waitress, when asked for a 12 inch sub.
"Would you like to care for a cup of coffee?" - A waitress.
"Which of these more...

One day brittany spears walked into a hotel and asked the clerk if there was a room available, and he sayd yes, but its haunted. She sayd, thats fine im brave. and got the key and went upstairs. later that night, when she was brushing her teeth, she heard a tiny voice saying "when the log rools over we will all be dead". She got so scared that she ran to the window jumped out and died. Next day Tom Cruise came to the hotel and asked if there was a room available. the clerk sayd, yes but its haunted. Tom sayd thats fine, im brave. SO he went up to the room. That night when he was just getting into bed, he heard this voice saying "When the log rolls over we will all be dead".
he got so scared he ran to the window and jumped out and died. the next morning Elvis Presly came to the hotel(dosnt matter that it was a completely different era) and asked for a room. The clerk sayd sure but its haunted. Elvis sayd thats fine, im brave, and went up to the room. that night more...

A guy driving a Yugo pulled up to a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. He rolled down his window and shouted to the driver of the Rolls. "Hey, buddy, thats a nice car. You got a phone in your Rolls? Ive got a phone in my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls looked over and said snobbishly, "Yes, I have a phone." The driver of the Yugo said, "Cool! Hey, you also got a fridge in there, too? Ive got one in the back seat of my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls, much annoyed, says, "Yes, I have a refrigerator." The driver of the Yugo said, "Thats great, man! Hey, you got a TV in there? You know, I got a TV in the back seat of my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls, quite irritated by now, replied, "Of course, I have a television. A Rolls-Royce is the finest luxury car in the world!" The driver of the Yugo said, "Yes, a very cool car! Hey, you got a bed in there? I got a bed in the back of my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls, upset that he more...

A guy driving a Yugo pulls up at a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. The driver of the Yugo rolls down his window and shouts to the driver of the Rolls, “Hey, buddy, that’s a nice car. You got a phone in your Rolls? I’ve got one in my Yugo! ” The driver of Rolls looks over and says simply, “Yes I have a phone. ” The driver of the Yugo says, “Cool! Hey, you got a fridge in there too? I got a fridge in the back seat of my Yugo! ” The driver of the Rolls, looking annoyed, says, “Yes, I have a refrigerator. ” The driver of the Yugo says, “That’s great, man! Hey, you got a TV in there, too? You know, I got a TV in the back seat of my Yugo! ” The driver of the Rolls, looking very annoyed by now, says, “Of course I have a television. A Rolls-Royce is the finest luxury car in the world! ” The driver of the Yugo says, “Very cool car! Hey, you got a bed in there, too? I got a bed in the back of my Yugo! ” Upset that he did not have a bed, the driver of the more...

One afternoon, this blonde drives down a highway to visit a nearby lake and relax. On his way to the lake, a guy dressed from head to toe in red standing on the side of the highway gestures for him to stop.
Blonde rolls down the window and says, "How can I help you?"
"I am the red jerk of the highway. You got something to eat?"
With a smile in his face, blonde hands a sandwich to the guy in red and drives away. Not even five minutes later, he comes across another guy. This guy is dressed fully in yellow, standing on the side and waving for him to stop.
A bit irritated, blonde stops, cranks down the window, and says, "What can I do for you?"
"I am the yellow jerk of the highway. You got something to drink?"
Hardly managing to smile this time, he hands the guy a can of cola and stomps on the pedal and takes off again. In order to make it to the lakeside before sunset, he decides to go faster and not to stop no matter more...