Rows Jokes / Recent Jokes

A writer dies and reaches the Golden Gates where God gives him a choice to either go to Heaven or Hell. He finds it difficult to make up his mind so he asks God if he can have a little tour of both places.
God agrees and they first go to Hell where the writer sees rows and rows of writers, chained to their desks in an overheated room, being whipped if they stopped writing for a second by merciless editors and publishers. This really frightens the writer who then proceeds to Heaven hoping it'll be better.
In Heaven too he sees rows of writers, chained to their desks in an over heated room, being whipped mercilessly.
So he turns to God and says, "But they're both the same!" To which God replies, "Oh no. Here in Heaven your work gets published!"

A writer dies and reaches the Golden Gates where God gives him a choice to either go to Heaven or Hell. He finds it difficult to make up his mind so he asks God if he can have a little tour of both places.
God agrees and they first go to Hell where the writer sees rows and rows of writers, chained to their desks in an overheated room, being whipped if they stopped writing for a second by merciless editors and publishers. This really frightens the writer who then proceeds to Heaven hoping it'll be better.
In Heaven too he sees rows of writers, chained to their desks in an over heated room, being whipped mercilessly.
So he turns to God and says, "But they're both the same!"
To which God replies, "Oh no. Here in Heaven your work gets published!"

A writer dies and reaches the Golden Gates where God gives him a choice to either go to Heaven or Hell. He finds it difficult to make up his mind so he asks God if he can have a little tour of both places.God agrees and they first go to Hell where the writer sees rows and rows of writers, chained to their desks in an overheated room, being whipped if they stopped writing for a second by merciless editors and publishers. This really frightens the writer who then proceeds to Heaven hoping it'll be better.In Heaven too he sees rows of writers, chained to their desks in an over heated room, being whipped mercilessly.So he turns to God and says, "But they're both the same!"To which God replies, "Oh no. Here in Heaven your work gets published!"

One Easter Sunday in a large Baptist church in Birmingham, Al., the minister decided to have all the young children come forward to the front of the sanctuary in their new Easter outfits for a quick "children's sermon." He couldn't help but notice one especially pretty little blond-haired, blue-eyed girl about five or six years old. She was wearing a beautiful white frilly dress, with rows and rows of ruffles head to toe. But she had such a sad expression on her face. Trying to cheer her up, the minister called her by name, and said "you look SO lovely this morning. And I know you will wear that dress a lot because it is SO gorgeous."Sadly, she shook her head, and said, "no, preacher, I won't ever wear this dress again."Naturally, he couldn't imagine that response.... so he said, "but, honey, you look so beautiful in that dress." The little girl said, "well, thank you preacher, but I will never wear this dress again." The minister more...

This leper goes to a baseball game and sits in a fairly empty section so the people around him won't have to look at his condition. Just before the game starts a guy sits in the row behind him, and another sits a few rows back.

About the third inning the guy a few rows back turns to the side and vomits all over the seat next to him. The leper turns around and begins to apologize, "I'm sorry, I will move, I know that it was because of my horrible condition that you just vomited," to which the guy replies, "No, no, it isn't you, I swear." Still not completely satisfied, the leper turns around.

Two innings later the guy does it again, vomits on the seat next to him. Again the leper turns around and says, "I appreciate that you're not saying anything, but I can tell that you're disgusted and I will move to a different seat." The guy gives the same response, swearing it isn't the leper that's upsetting his stomach.

During the more...

A traveller was driving through Arkansas when he lost his way and got off the main highway.

As he drove by, he saw rows and rows of pigsties and pigpens and pigs running in fields and pigs wallowing in mud. Suddenly, his eye caught something really strange. He did a double take, muttered to himself and then looked a third time. He wondered if he had seen correctly - it looked like a pig with a wooden leg!

He found the lane to the farm and drove up into the farmyard, where he was met by the farmer. "Excuse me," the traveller said. "I was just driving by and looking at all your pigs, and I noticed something that I just had to stop and ask about. Tell me, did I see right? Is there really a pig out there with a wooden leg?"

The farmer smiled. "Oh, that would be old Caesar you saw. He's the finest pig a man could ever hope to have - and smart! Well, let me tell you a little about that pig. You see that barge down there on the river? more...

A traveler was driving through Arkansas when he lost his way and got off the main highway. As he drove by, he saw rows and rows of pigsties and pigpens and pigs running in fields and pigs wallowing in mud. Suddenly, his eye caught something really strange. He did a double take, muttered to himself and then looked a third time. He wondered if he had seen correctly - it looked like a pig with a wooden leg!He found the lane to the farm and drove up into the farmyard, where he was met by the farmer. "Excuse me," the traveler said. "I was just driving by and looking at all your pigs, and I noticed something that I just had to stop and ask about. Tell me, did I see right? Is there really a pig out there with a wooden leg?" The farmer smiled. "Oh, that would be old Caesar you saw. He's the finest pig a man could ever hope to have - and smart! Well, let me tell you a little about that pig. You see that barge down there on the river? That's a mining dredge, taking out more...