Whip Jokes

Banta: "I'm going to become a lion tamer."
Santa: "That's crazy, you don't know nothing about no lion taming."
Banta: "Yes I do!"
Santa: "Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?"
Banta: "I'll take that big chair they all carry, and I'll stick it in his face until he backs down."
Santa: "Well, what if the lion takes that big paw, and hooks the chair with them big claws, and throws that chair out of the cage? What do you do then?"
Banta: "I'll take that whip they all carry, and I'll whip him and whip him until he backs down."
Santa: "Well, what if that lion bites that whip with his big teeth, and bites it in two? What you gonna do then?"
Banta: "I'll take that gun they all carry, and shoot him."
Santa: "Well, what if that gun doesn't work? What will you do then?"
Banta: "I'll more...

wo unemployed guys are talking. One says, "I'm going to become a lion tamer." The other replies, "That's crazy, you don't know nothing about no lion taming." "Yes I do!" "Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?" "Well, then I take that big chair they all carry, and I stick it in his face until he backs down." "Well, what if the lion takes that big paw, and hooks the chair with them big claws, and throws that chair out of the cage? What do you do then?" "Well, then I takes that whip they all carry, and I whip him and whip him until he backs down." "Well, what if that lion bites that whip with his big teeth, and bites it in two? What you gonna do then?" "Well, then I take that gun they all carry, and I shoot him." "Well, what if that gun doesn't work? What will you do then?" "Well, then I pick up some of the shit more...

There was a hotel that was widely known for having room service that could provide anything a person could want. A traveler there checked in and immediatly called room service.
He said " I want brought to my room, a young virgin between the ages of eighteen and nineteen with blonde hair and blue eyes. I also want four peices of rope, exactly four feet in length, and a whip. Lastly, I want a Hungarian valet, thirty years old, with a dark complexion. Hurry, because I'm tired and want to relax." About an hour later, room service called back, "Sir, We are very sorry, we have the rope and the whip. The virgin was harder to find because around here, few girls reach that age with virginity intact. We have however, found one of the rare ones and she is somewhat blonde. We are extremely sorry to tell you though, that while we could not find a Hungarian valet as you requested, we have found a Romanian one. Will that do?"
The traveler sighed. "I'm afraid not. So more...

A Pakistani was sitting with an Indian and Malaysianin Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled barrel of beer, when all of a sudden Saudi police entered and arrested them.

But, as it was a nationalholiday, the Sheikh decided they should be released after receiving20 lashes of the whip.

As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly said: "I allow each of you one wish before your whipping."

So the Malaysian guy thought for a while and then
said: "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through.

The India n guy, watching the scene, said: "Please fix two pillows on my back".

But even two pillows could only take 10 lashes before the whip went through again. Sheikh turned to Pakistani and said: "You are from a brother country, so you can have 2 wishes!"

"Thank you, Most Royal and Merciful more...

A pakistani was sitting with an indian and malaysianin saudi arabia, sharing a smuggled barrel of beer, when all of a
Sudden saudi police entered and arrested them. But, as it was a nationalholiday, the sheikh decided they should be released after receiving20 lashes of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the sheikh suddenly said:
“i allow each of you one wish before your whipping. ”
So the malaysian guy thought for a while and then
Said: “please tie a pillow to my back. ” This was done but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through.
The indian guy, watching the scene, said: “please fix two pillows on my back”. But even two pillows could only take 10
Lashes before the whip went through again. Sheikh turned to pakistani and said: “you are from a brother country, so you can have 2 wishes! ”
“thank you, most royal and merciful highness”, the pakistani replies.
“my first wish is: i would more...