Salesman Jokes / Recent Jokes

I was travelling to Seattle on business. Knowing how the weather is up there (and lacking the proper clothing), I went to a local outdoor shop for a inclement weather clothing. Not finding what I was looking for, I went to another. Then another. Finally, a salesman suggested that I go to Rudolph's.
"Rudolph's?" I said, surprised. "Do you mean the Russian specialty store?"
To which the salesman answered, "Rudolph the Red knows rain gear."

I'm sure you've all heard about the traveling salesman whose car became disabled in the middle of nowhere.
It took him several hours to make it to the nearest farm house, he finally reached their front door and knocked on it.
A grizzled old farmer answered, and the salesman pleaded for a place to spend the night.
"Why sure young fella, I can give you a place to bunk." said the hospitable old man. "But I ain't got no daughter for you to sleep with, like you always hear about them in jokes."
"Oh !" said the salesman. Then thinking a moment or two he asked, "How far is it to the next farmhouse ?"

Two salesmen are traveling in the country when their car breaks down. The only house around for miles was a large mansion. They knock on the door and a beautiful widow answers the door. Since it is early evening and the garage will not be opened until morning, she offers to let them spend the night in the guest bedrooms.
In the morning they call the tow truck and leave.
About three months later salesman number one opens a letter and can't believe what he reads. He goes to salesman number two and says:
"When we spent the night at the widow's mansion, did you sneak away into her bedroom in the middle of the night?"
"Why, yes I did."
"And did you use my name?"
"Why, yes how did you know?"
"Well, it seems she died and left me her 5 million dollar estate!"

A small company was on the edge of bankruptcy. The owner summoned his two-man sales force into his office. "Things aren't going too well, guys," he announced grimly. "So to perk up sales I'm announcing a contest. The guy with the most sales gets a blow job."

"What does the loser get?" asked one of the salesmen.

The owner looked at both men and said, "The loser gets to give it."

He entered in one of the Watch Shops in Manhattan and went one round all through the shop.
One of the Salesmen invited him and asked him about his requirements. He wanted one Gents Wrist Watch. The Salesman showed him one of the best choice in his shop.
Pyara was impressed by the piece and asked the price of the watch. The salesmen tole him it is $100/-. Hearing the price he recollected one of his friend`s piece of advice that in Manhattan all items are doubly charged. Taking into consideration of his friend`s advice he started negotiating.
He told the Salesman if it is for $50/- he is interested. The Salesman did not want to lose the business. He came down with the price $80/-
Again Pyara wanted the Watch for $40/-. Then the salesman told "no no I will charge you $50/- last price".
Again Pyara wanted the watch for $25/-. Hearing this the Salesmen got annoyed and told Pyara he is giving the Watch Free Of Cost.
Pyara was happy and asked the more...

A man walked into a pet store looking for a new pet for his wife.
So he asked the salesman for some assistance. The salesguy brought the man to a parrot in the back.
"Now this is the perfect pet for your wife, Chet is an very special animal" the salesman said.
"What makes him so special?" the man asked.
The salesman took a lighter from his pocket and held it under the Chet's right foot, and Chet started to sing "Jingle bells, jingle bells.." and then the salesman held the lighter under is left foot and Chet started to sing "Deck the halls..."
So the man asked, "What happens if you hold the lighter between his feet?"
"Well I don't know" answered the salesman.
So he holds the lighter between the parrot's legs and instantly Chet began to sing...
"Chet's nuts roasting on an open fire..."

A man walked into a pet store looking for a new pet for his wife.So he asked the salesman for some assistance. The salesguy brought the man to a parrot in the back."Now this is the perfect pet for your wife, Chet is an very special animal" the salesman said."What makes him so special?" the man asked.The salesman took a lighter from his pocket and held it under the Chet's right foot, and Chet started to sing "Jingle bells, jingle bells.." and then the salesman held the lighter under is left foot and Chet started to sing "Deck the halls..."So the man asked, "What happens if you hold the lighter between his feet?""Well I don't know" answered the salesman.So he holds the lighter between the parrot's legs and instantly Chet began to sing..."Chet's nuts roasting on an open fire..."