Santa Banta Jokes / Recent Jokes

Having snuck out with a very cute young woman that he met at a party, Banta, exhausted from hours of hot sex, woke up at her apartment at 3 A. M. "Oh God!" Banta thought, "Jeeto`s gonna kill me!" Trying to figure out how he would explain this to Jeeto without getting whacked with a frying pan, inspiration struck first. Banta dashed out to the nearest pay phone, dialed his home number quickly, and breathlessly said, "Jeeto, Jeeto! Don`t pay the ransom!!! I escaped!!!"

Santa took his wife and son into to the big city shopping one saturday. As they approached town, they were astonished by the sky scrapers.
Santa never having been to the big city himself decided to let the wife out at the local mall while he and the son did some sight- seeing.
They entered a large building with an enormous lobby. The son noticed this door on the wall and ask Santa what it was for?
Santa not knowing decided to get closer for better observation. A few minutes later a old lady with a cane comes over and presses a button located near the door, the door opens and the old lady enters a small room. The door proceeds to close and Santa and son stand there amazed as lights blink over the door when all of a sudden the door opens and a very beautiful young lady exits.
Astonished, Santa looks at his son while scratching his head, and say`s, "Son, I don`t know what just happened, but run fast and fetch your mother."

Once Banta asked Santa, "What is the secret behind your happy married life?"
Santa said, "You should share responsibilities with due love and respect to each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems."
Banta asked, "Can you explain?"
Santa said, "In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each other`s decisions."
Still not convinced, Banta asked, "Give me some examples" Santa said, "Smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are decided by my wife. I just agree to it"
Banta asked, "Then what is your role?"
Santa said, "My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether America should attack Iraq, whether Britain should lift sanction over Zimbabwe, more...

A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a party and his host, Banta, naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Banta asked "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." "What sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, `Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?` Banta thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn`t happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don`t know much about history

A man was traveling down a country road when he saw a large group of people outside a house.

He stopped and asked a person why the large crowd was there.

A farmer replied, "Banta`s mule kicked his mother-in-law and she died."

"Well," replied the man, "she must have had a lot of friends."

"Nope," said the farmer, "we all just want to buy his mule

Santa thought he had conquered his problem of trying to remember his wife`s birthday and, also, their anniversary. He opened an account with a florist, provided that florist with the dates and instructions to send flowers to Jeetoo on these dates along with an appropriate note signed, "Your loving husband." Jeeto was thrilled by this new display of attention and all went well until one day, some bouquets later, when Santa came home, kissed her and said offhandedly, "Nice flowers, where`d you get them?"

Banta singh finished his English exam and came out. His friends asked him how did he do his exam, for that he replied "Exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought. .. and atlast I wrote THUNK! !!"