Sayings Jokes

Top 10 Sayings of Biblical Mothers
10. Samson! Get your hand out of that lion. You don't know where it's been!
9. David! I told you not to play in the house with that sling! Go practice your harp. We pay good money for those lessons!
8. Abraham! Stop wandering around the countryside and get home for supper!
7. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego! I told you never to play with fire!
6. Cain! Get off your brother! You're going to kill him some day!
5. Noah! No, you can't keep them! I told you, don't bring home any more strays!
4. Gideon! Have you been hiding in that wine press again? Look at your clothes!
3. James and John! No more burping contests at the dinner table, please. People are going to call you the sons of thunder!

2. Judas! Have you been in my purse again?!
1. Jesus! Stop working on that old wood and come in and eat! You'd spend your life on that wood, if your father asked you to!

Programmers Sayings...
''BASIC - A programming language. Related to certain social diseases in that those who have it will not admit it in polite company.'' - Anon.
''I speak BASIC to clients, 1-2-3 to management, and mumble to myself.'' - Anon.
''If you're masochistic enough to program in ADA, we're not going to stop you.'' - Matt Welsh
''Don't get suckered in by the comments... they can terribly be misleading.'' - Dave Storer
''If we can dispel the delusion that learning about computers should be an activity of fiddling with array indexes and worrying whether X is an integer or a real number, we can begin to focus on programming as a source of ideas.'' - Harold Abelson
''Optimization hinders evolution.'' - Anon.
''Programming graphics in X is like finding the square root of PI using Roman numerals.'' - Henry Spencer
''The best book on programming for the layman is Alice in Wonderland; but that's because it's the best book on anything for layman.'' - more...

Top Ten Inspirational Sayings We'd Like to See at the Nurse's Station
10. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings; they did it by killing all those who opposed them.
9. If at first you don't succeed... try management.
8. TEAMWORK means never having to take all the blame yourself.
7. Hang in there.... retirement is only 35 years away!
6. Go the extra mile... it makes your supervisor look incompetent.
5. When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break.
4. Administration... we waste time so you don't have to.
3. The beatings will continue until morale improves.
2. A person who smiles in the face of adversity, probably has a scapegoat.
1. Succeed in spite of Administration.

Sayings you'd like to see on office inspirational posters

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If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.

The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.

Sure, you may not like working here, but we pay your rent.

If you think we're a bad firm, you should see our rivals!

Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings -- they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

A person who smiles in the face of adversity... probably has a scapegoat.

ABANDON ALL HOPE, YE WHO ENTER HERE.....

2 days without a Human Rights Violation!

If at first you don't succeed - try management.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.

Never quit until you have another job.

Work harder you slaves!

The beatings will continue more...

The website combines visitors funny sayings with their photos in order to create funny collage.