Session Jokes / Recent Jokes

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A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second mom. "Your obsession is money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He turned to the third mom. "Your obsession is alcohol and your child's name is Brandy."

At this point, the fourth mother got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, "Come on, Dick, let's go home."

At the first session of a conversion class theminister conducting the class asked, "What mustwe do before we can expect forgiveness from sin?" After a long silence, one of the men in attendanceraised his hand and said: "Sin?"

While attending a spelling session in school one day, The teacher asked if anyone could spell the word DUMB? Darla raises her hand and says "I can, I can"The teacher replies, "OK, go ahead Darla..."Darla replies..."D-U-M-B"The teacher replies, "very good", and "can you use that word in a sentence?" Darla replies, "Sure, Buckwheat is very DUMB." The teacher replies, "OK, well can anyone spell the word STUPID?" Again, Darla raises her hand, and the teacher replies, "OK, go ahead Darla." Darla replies, "S-T-U-P-I-D"The teacher replies "very good", and "can you use that word in a sentence?" Darla replies, "Sure, Buckwheat is very STUPID." The teacher replies, "OK, well lets continue, can anyone spell the word DICTATE?" No one raises their hand, so the teacher asks Buckwheat if he can spellthe word DICTATE? Buckwheat replies, "Sure, D-I-C-T-A-T-E"The more...

After their love-making session the young bride asks her husband "Wasmaking love to me really the same as making love to Marilyn Monroe?" "Yes, she's dead to!""Was making love to me really the same as makinglove to Marilyn Monroe?" "Yes, she's dead to!"

One day in the convent the nuns had their morning prayer session. At the end of the prayer session the head nun stood up and addressed the rest of the nuns. She said, "There was a man in the convent last night." 99 of the nuns go ohhh, and 1 of them goes hee hee hee.The head nun goes on, "We found a condom in the garden." Again 99 of the nuns go ohhhh, 1 nun goeshee hee hee.The head nun continues "There was a hole in that condom." 99 nuns go hee hee hee, 1 nun goes ohhh.

At a session with a marriage counselor, the wife snapped at her husband: "That's not true! I do so enjoy sex!"
Then, turning to the counselor, she explained: "But this animal expects it four or five times a year!"