Singh Jokes / Recent Jokes
Banta Singh saw that his friend santa Singh was very
depressed.
"What happened ?" asked banta.
"Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . " "How come ?"
"Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England
was being shown live on TV.I bet Rs.500 that India would win,
but I lost the bet."
" But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?" " Yaar, I
bet on the highlights too "
This one is about Santa Singhji... our English lecturer
Santa Singh ji is the English teacher in a school. He is very well renowned, since all his students do very well in exams.
The school is having an inspection and the inspector decided to visit the English class. This is what transpires:
Santa Singh: " Bolo bachon GADHA "
Students (in chorous): "GADHA "
Santa Singh: " Bolo bachon GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE GADHA "
Students (in chorous): "GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE GADHA "
Santa Singh: " Bolo bachon GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE MEIN "
Students (in chorous): "GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE MEIN"
Santa Singh: " Bolo bachon GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE MEIN AUR MERE PECHE SAARA DESH "
Students (in chorous): "GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE GADHA, GADHE KE PECHE MEIN AUR MERE PECHE SAARA DESH"
By this time the inspector is furious. He more...
BANTA Singh: "Yaar Santa, last year the name-plate outside your house read Santa Singh B. A. This year it reads Santa Singh M. A. when did you get your Masters degree?
Santa Singh: "You don'i understand. Last year my wife died, I put B. A. to indicate Bachelor Again. Then I took a second wife, so M. A. is Married Again."
Once Santa Singh and some other country scientists came for launching a rocket. They started the counting 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 go! The rocket was still there. They tried it 3, 4 times.
Then Santa said'Wait I'll try"
He climed up the rocket, first tilted to left, then to the right. He climed down, and then asked them to count. They started 10 9 8...... go! The rocket went.
Everybody asked "How did u do it''.
Santa replied'In our country we start our bajaj scooter like that only...
Banta Singh stuck on an elevator
Santa Singh: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs. because of a power failure.
Banta Singh: Thats alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 4 hrs.
The phone rings at Punjab Police headquaters. They answer: "Hello?"
"Hello, Is that the Punjab Police?"
"Yes. What do you want?'
"I'm calling to report my neighbour Santa Singh as an enemy of the
state. He is hiding diamonds in his firewood."
"This will be noted."
Next day, the Punjab Police goons come over to Santa Singh's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept, break every piece of wood, find no diamonds, swear at Santa Singh and leave.
The phone rings at Santa Singh's house. He answers,"Hello."
"Hello Santa! Did the Punjab Police come?"
"Did they chop your firewood?'
"Yes they did."
"O. K., now it's your turn to call. I need my vegetable patch plowed."
BEPPO SINGH QUEUING BEHIND HIS FRIEND AT AN ATM MACHINE.
Friend: What are you looking at?
Beppo Singh: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.
Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?
Beppo Singh: four asterisks!