Skeleton Jokes / Recent Jokes

What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.Why was the Tomato blushing? Because he saw the salad dressing. A termite walks into a barroom and asks, "Is the bar tender here?" Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he/she had no guts! What do John the Baptist & Winnie the Pooh have in common? Their middle name.Why are there so many Johnsons in the phone book? They all have phones.What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck! Why don't cannibals eat comedians? Because they taste funny.A skeleton is in a bar. He goes up to the bar. "A pint of lager and a mop please."Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud." "Yes sir, it's fresh ground."What's brown and sticky? A stick.A horse walks into a bar, the barman says "why the long face?"Why are proctologists so gloomy? They always have the end in sight.What do you give an elephant with diarreha? Lots of RoomWhat does mozart do now that he is dead? He decomposes.Why do they more...

Tourist: Whose Skeleton Is That?
Santa: Tipu's Skeleton.
Tourist: Whose Is That Smaller Skeleton Next To It?
Santa: That Was Tipu's Skeleton When He Was Child

A witch joke
How is the witches team doing?
They’re having a spell in the first division!

A werewolf joke
How do you make a werewolf stew?
Keep him waiting for two hours!

A skeleton joke
What do you call a skeleton that is always telling lies?
A boney phoney!

A vampire joke
What does Mrs Dracula say to Mr Dracula when he goes out to work in the evening?
“Have a nice bite”!

A ghost joke
Why did the ghost go to the funfair?
He wanted to go on a rollerghoster!

A cannibal joke
How can you help a starving cannibal?
Give them a hand!

A cannibal joke
When do cannibals cook you?
On Fried-days!

Did you hear about the skeleton that walked into a bar and ordered a beer and a mop?

Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road? Because he didn't have enough guts

A Halloween joke
What do witches eat at Halloween?
Spooketti, halloweenies, devils food cake and booberry pie!

A vampire joke
What’s Dracula’s car called?
A mobile blood unit!

A werewolf joke
What do you call a hairy beast with clothes on?
A wear-wolf!

A witch joke
Why did the witch go over the mountain?
Because she couldn’t go under it!

A skeleton joke
Why didn’t the skeleton want to play football?
Because his heart wasn’t in it!

A cannibal joke
Why was the cannibal looking peeky?
Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!

A wizard joke
If a wizard was knocked out by Dracula in a fight what would he be?
Out for the count!

A vampire joke
What’s a vampire’s favourite sport?
Batminton!

A werewolf joke
What do you call a werewolf that drinks too much?
A whino!

A witch joke
Where did the witch get her furniture?
From the ideal gnome exhibition!

A skeleton joke
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
He had no body to go with!

A cannibal joke
What happened at the cannibal’s wedding party?
They toasted the bride and groom!

A ghost joke
How can you tell if a corpse is angry?
It flips its lid!

A demon joke
What do demons have on holiday?
A devil of a time!