Sky Jokes / Recent Jokes

Why is the sky not happy on clear days? It has the blues

Noah And Today's ArkThe Lord spoke to Noah and said, "Noah, in six months I am goingto make it rain until the whole world is covered with water andall the evil things are destroyed. But, I want to save a few goodpeople and two of every living thing on the planet. I am orderingyou to build an ark." And, in a flash of lightning, he deliveredthe specifications for the ark."OK," Noah said, trembling with fear and fumbling with theblueprints, "I'm your man.""Six months and it starts to rain," thundered the Lord. "Youbetter have my ark completed or learn to swim for a long, longtime!"Six months passed, the sky began to cloud up, and the rain beganto fall in torrents. The Lord looked down and saw Noah sitting inhis yard, weeping, and there was no ark."Noah!" shouted the Lord, "where is My ark?" A lightning boltcrashed into the ground right beside Noah."Lord, please forgive me!" begged Noah. "I did my best, more...

Noah was standing by his house one day, when a light came down and a voice said: "In six months I'm going to make it rain until the whole earth is covered with water and all the evil people are destroyed. But I want to save a few good people, and two of every kind of animal on the planet. I am ordering you to build an Ark. Here are the plans."

And Noah found that suddenly he had Ark plans in his hands. Noah said he would do as ordered.

"It will begin to rain in six months," said the voice. "You must better have the Ark completed, or you will certainly drown."

After six months, the skies began to cloud up and rain began to fall. Noah was sitting in his front yard, weeping. There was no Ark. Again a light came from the sky.

"Noah, where is my Ark?"

"Forgive me Lord," begged Noah. "I did my best. But there were big problems. First I had to get a building permit for the Ark more...

Scott goes hiking on his own to commune with nature. He gets too close to the edge of a cliff, slips, and finds himself hanging by his hands from the branch of a little tree growing about 10 feet down from the top and 100 feet above a sheer drop to the rocks below. Yelling for help being of no avail, Scott sees his life passing before his eyes, and finally, in desperation, calls up into the sky, "Is there anybody up there?"
A great voice booms out, "Yes, Scott, I am here."
"Who are you?"
"It's me, your God."
"Help me," calls Scott.
"I'll help you. Let go of the tree."
"What?"
"Trust in me. Let go of the tree and I will help you."
Scott thinks for a minute, then calls up into the sky, "Is there anybody else up there?"

We all live under the same sky, but we don't see the same horizon.

Travelling together once were a Russian, an American & the saviour of our nation - Sardarji!!! Each of them wanted to prove that their country was the greatest. Said the Russian, " We have a rocket that could touch the sky." "We dont believe it ", said the others.
"Ok! Ok! but just 2cms. below the sky"
Not to be out done the American said, " We have a submarine that can touch the ocean-bed of the deepest part on this planet."
"We don't believe it ", said the others.
"Ok! Ok! but just 2cms. above the ocean-bed"
Our hero with a smile on his face said, "In our country we all eat
with our nose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Once upon a time, there was a king who had a daughter of marriageable age. As he was very fond of his daughter and he didn't want her to leave him, he made an impossible offer to his kingdom's men. He announced that whoever has two pricks would be eligible to marry his daughter. The invitation spread far and wide. Of course there were no one who came forth, and the king was secretly pleased. In another part of the kingdom, there were 2 woodcutter brothers, Jack & Jim. One day, they chanced upon a very big tree and decided to chop it down for it would fetch them a decent amount of money if sold as firewood. As they were about to chop it down with their sharp axes, a voice cried out, "STOP! Please don't hurt me! " The brothers were scared shitless when suddenly an apparition appeared from out of the tree. He told them that he was the genie of the tree and if they would to spare him, he would grant them a wish each. Remembering the king's offer of his daughter as bride, the more...