Socialist Jokes

A young, ruthless executive died and went to hell. When he got there, he saw one sign that said Capitalist Hell, and another that saidSocialist Hell. In front of the Socialist Hell was an incredibly longline, while there was no-one in front of the Capitalist Hell. So theexecutive asked the guard, "What do they do to you in Socialist Hell?""They boil you in oil, whip you, and then put you on the rack," theguard replied."And what do they do to you in Capitalist Hell?""The same exact thing," the guard answered."Then why is everybody in line for Socialist Hell?""Because in Socialist Hell, they're always out of oil, whips, and racks!"

Life In Hell

A young, ruthless executive died and went to hell. When he got there, he saw one sign that said Capitalist Hell, and another that said Socialist Hell.

In front of the Socialist Hell was an incredibly long line, while there was no-one in front of the Capitalist Hell. So the executive asked the guard,' 'What do they do to you in Socialist Hell?''

''They boil you in oil, whip you, and then put you on the rack,'' the guard replied.

''And what do they do to you in Capitalist Hell?''

''The same exact thing,'' the guard answered.

''Then why is everybody in line for Socialist Hell?''

''Because in Socialist Hell, they're always out of oil, whips, and racks!''

Chandrika: I considered you as a freedom fighter, the moment I read,
“HARD HARD ONE IS THE BIG BIG GOOD ONE(to be
circulated)” Written by you to the infolanka joke page.

Chandrika: Please show me how to bring a political change in Sri Lanka.
ULTRA MICROS: Your Excellency, its this New Constitution.
Chandrika: Will People Support Me.
ULTRA MICROS: Its Foolishness if they don’t do so.
ULTRA MICROS: Your Excellency, good luck to you.

ULTRA MICRO CONSTITUTION OF THE DEMOCRATIC SOCIALIST REPUBLIC OF SRI LANKA.
Section 1
Democratic Socialist Republic of Sri Lanka is an unitary
State Which Is Comprised of 24 Key Administrative District
Councils and There Sub Councils.
Section 2
All Laws relating to Citizenship, Matrimony, Inheritance and
Succession shall be governed by The General Law.
Section 3
English, Sinhala and Tamil shall be Official Languages.
Section 4
There shall be The more...

A young, ruthless executive died and went to hell. When he got there, he saw one sign that said Capitalist Hell, and another that saidSocialist Hell. In front of the Socialist Hell was an incredibly longline, while there was no-one in front of the Capitalist Hell. So theexecutive asked the guard, "What do they do to you in Socialist Hell?" "They boil you in oil, whip you, and then put you on the rack," theguard replied." And what do they do to you in Capitalist Hell?" "The same exact thing," the guard answered." Then why is everybody in line for Socialist Hell?" "Because in Socialist Hell, they're always out of oil, whips, and racks!"

A young, ruthless executive died and went to hell. When he got there, he saw one sign that said Capitalist Hell, and another that said Socialist Hell. In front of the Socialist Hell was an incredibly long line, while there was no-one in front of the Capitalist Hell. So the executive asked the guard, "What do they do to you in Socialist Hell?"
"They boil you in oil, whip you, and then put you on the rack," the guard replied.
"And what do they do to you in Capitalist Hell?"
"The same exact thing," the guard answered.
"Then why is everybody in line for Socialist Hell?"
"Because in Socialist Hell, they're always out of oil, whips, and racks!"