Lanka Jokes

A Sri Lankan is calmly having his breakfast when an American, typically chewing gum, sits down beside him. The Sri Lankan ignores the American who begins to chat:

The American: Do you eat that bread-entirely?
The Sri Lankan: Of course!
The American: We do not. We only eat the inner part, the crust is put in a container, later processed, transformed into flour and then sold to Sri Lanka. The Sri Lankan says nothing.
The American continues: Do you eat this jelly with the bread?
The Sri Lankan repeats: Of course.
The American: We do not. We eat our fresh fruits for breakfast; we keep all the peels and seeds in the containers. Later we process it, and transform it into jelly and then we sell it to Sri Lanka.

The Sri Lankan asks: And what do you do with the condoms after you use them?
The American: We throw them away, of course!
The Sri Lankan: We do not. We keep them in containers, process them, transform them in to chewing gum and more...

Our famous Udurawana was attending a conference in London. He was flying for the first time. Here are some incidents which took place during that trip.
GETTING ON
At Katunayake airport, the passengers were climbing the steps to board the plane. A foreigner missed his step & slipped. He shouted "Oh, I lost my balance!" and the moving got slowed down a bit. Udurawana was at the bottom of the steps anxiously waiting to get in to the plane for the first time and he shouted, "Doesn't matter you fool, I have enough coins in my pocket. I'll give you some later! "
EMBARKATION CARD
When it was closer to London, Passengers were given the embarkation card to fill. Udurawana started filling.
Full Name: Heen Banda Udurawana
Sex: Ticked the Female Box and wrote below: unlike these foreigners, we always have sex with females!
GETTING OFF
Getting off Finally, the plane arrives at Heathrow. Udurawana was excited and anxious to get off. So he more...

A teacher was teaching about great people of Sri Lanka, in grade 5 class. The teacher asked to name a great person in Sri Lanka. One child said Srimath Anagarika Dhramapala Thuma, Other one said Srimath Walisingha Harischandra Thuma.
One of the children in the class thought every name starts with Srimath. I should think of a name starting with Srimath. The child said Srimath Madana Modakaya.

Chandrika: I considered you as a freedom fighter, the moment I read,
“HARD HARD ONE IS THE BIG BIG GOOD ONE(to be
circulated)” Written by you to the infolanka joke page.

Chandrika: Please show me how to bring a political change in Sri Lanka.
ULTRA MICROS: Your Excellency, its this New Constitution.
Chandrika: Will People Support Me.
ULTRA MICROS: Its Foolishness if they don’t do so.
ULTRA MICROS: Your Excellency, good luck to you.

ULTRA MICRO CONSTITUTION OF THE DEMOCRATIC SOCIALIST REPUBLIC OF SRI LANKA.
Section 1
Democratic Socialist Republic of Sri Lanka is an unitary
State Which Is Comprised of 24 Key Administrative District
Councils and There Sub Councils.
Section 2
All Laws relating to Citizenship, Matrimony, Inheritance and
Succession shall be governed by The General Law.
Section 3
English, Sinhala and Tamil shall be Official Languages.
Section 4
There shall be The more...

Appuhamy uncle was booked into a flight to London from Colombo. But as
this was his first time in an aeroplane, he made a few preparations
that were out of place. When the stewardess came around to take orders
for the in-flight meal, the uncle declared loudly, "I have brought my
own lunch. Make sure you don't charge me for food and drinks!"
So, as everybody was given their in-flight meal, the uncle began
spreading out his own home-cooked meal. The man sitting next to him was
an English history researcher, who was curious about the food."Excuse
me, what is that
drink?" he asked. The uncle picked up the yoghurt-based lassi drink and
said, "Milk of Lanka!"
Then the uncle took out Kiribath and started feasting.
"And what is that dish?" asked the curious English. "Rice of Lanka! "
replied Appuhamy uncle proudly.
Finally, the uncle took out some Wattalapam desserts. He more...