Spoon Jokes / Recent Jokes

A blonde says to a brunette, ''Excuse me, but each time I sip my coffee, my eye seems to hurt.''
The brunette says, ''Well maybe you should take the spoon out of the cup.''

Tim Shandy stepped into the Warm Spoon, a popular Galway tavern. To Mike Callahan, the barkeep, Shandy said "Mike, I'll be havin'three whiskeys." Callahan set up three glasses and began to pour. "Now, Timothy, it's not the usual thing for you to ask for three whiskeys. It'scelebratin', you are." Ahh, ye know me too well, Micheal, ye do. Truth, and I'm celebratingme first blow job." Callahan smiled benevolently and set a fourth glass on the bar." Now, that's special," he said. "For an old customer like y'rself, here's a fourth on the house, so I may be sharin' your celebrationwith you." Shandy shook his head, and replied "'Tis verra kind of ye, Micheal, but I'm thinkin' if three won't get rid of the taste, four won'teither."

A little corporate humor
I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter as he handed us the menus. It seemed a little odd, but I dismissed it as a random thing. Until our busboy came with water & tableware; he too, sported a spoon in his breast pocket. I looked around the room, and all the waiters, waitresses, busboys, etc. had spoons in their pockets.
When our waiter returned to take our order, I just had to ask, "Why the spoons?"
"Well," he explained, "our parent company recently hired some Andersen
Consulting efficiency experts to review all our procedures, and after
months of statistical analyses, they concluded that our patrons drop
spoons on the floor 73% more often than any other utensil; at a frequency of 3 spoons per hour per workstation. By preparing all our workers for this contingency in advance, we can cut our trips to the kitchen down and save time...nearly 1.5 extra more...