Stick Jokes / Recent Jokes

A fellow was following a truck in heavy traffic. Every block or so, when they were stopped at a stop light, the driver of the truck would jump out of the cab with a big stick and bang on the side of the cargo bay. Hed then jump back into the cab in time to drive away when the signal changed. The first fellow observed this for several miles, until he could stand it no longer. The next time the truck driver jumped out with the stick, the first fellow jumped out and ran up to him. "Im sorry to bother you," he said, over the din of the banging, "but I am very curious; could you tellme what you are doing?" Without breaking rhythm, the truck driver replied, "Sure, Mac. Ya see, this heres a six-ton truck but Ive got eight tons of canaries aboard, so Ive gotta keep two ton of them flying all the time so I dont break an axle".

A man bought a brand new Grand Cherokee for 30-some thousand dollars with $400+ dollar monthly
payments. He immediately got hold of his friend and they went to do some male bonding. They went duck
hunting... and of course, all the lakes are frozen.
The two went to the lake with the guns, the dog, the beer and of course the new vehicle. They drove
out onto the lake ice and got ready. Now, they wanted to make some kind of a natural landing area for
the ducks, something for the decoys to float on. Remember, it's all ice and in order to make a hole
large enough to look like something a wandering duck would want to fly down and land on, it is going
to take a little more effort than an ice hole drill.
So, out of the new Grand Cherokee came the new owner, the friend, the dog, and a stick of dynamite
with a short, 40-second fuse. Now these 2 Rocket Scientists did take into consideration that if they
placed the stick of dynamite on the ice at a more...

A Priest, a Nun, and a Camel are crossing the desert.
The camel falls dead.
Before I die the father says, "I would like to see a woman naked. So the nun takes off all her clothes.
She then says, "before I die i would like to see a man naked. So the father takes off his clothes. She looks at his penis and says, "My God! What is that for?"
He says "You stick it in a hole and it brings forth life."
The nun replies, "Then how about you stick it up that camels ass and let's get the hell out of here!"

A Priest, a Nun, and a Camel are crossing the desert.The camel falls dead.Before I die the father says, "I would like to see a woman naked. So the nun takes off all her clothes.She then says, "before I die i would like to see a man naked. So the father takes off his clothes. She looks at his penis and says, "My God! What is that for?"He says "You stick it in a hole and it brings forth life."The nun replies, "Then how about you stick it up that camels ass and let's get the hell out of here!"

A husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop, and with them are their nine children.
A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit in the bus.
So the husband and the blind man decide to walk.
After a while the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the side walk and says to him: "Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end your stick, that ticking sound is driving me crazy!
The blind man replies: "If you would've put a rubber on the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus, so shut the hell up!"

Below are fine examples of what happens when marketing translations fail to reach a foreign country in an understandable way.

Coors put its slogan, "Turn it loose," into Spanish, where it was read as "Suffer from diarrhea."

Clairol introduced the "Mist Stick," a curling iron, into German only to find out that "mist" is slang for manure. Not too many people had use for the "manure stick".

Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following in an American campaign: Nothing sucks like an Electrolux.

The American slogan for Salem cigarettes, "Salem-Feeling Free", was translated into the Japanese market as "When smoking Salem, you will feel so refreshed that your mind seems to be free and empty."

When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the same packaging as in the US, with the beautiful baby on the label. Later they learned that in more...

VK. Krishna Menon, onetime Defence Minister, was a bachelor and hated people with large broods of children. In his early career as a barrister, a neighbour couple with three girls in tow called on him and suggested that he accompany them to the theatre as they had an extra ticket. The sixsome waited for a bus, and the first one had only room for four (no overloading). The second one came after five minutes and had only three vacancies, and the third had two. So they decided to walk the distance instead of being late for the show.
Menon was tramping on the cobblestones on the pavement, tuck tucking with his walking stick. The father, already irritated with not getting the bus, remarked,' Dammit, Krishna, can't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick?'
Pat came the reply:' If you had put one at the end of yours we would have got into a bus.'