Stranded Jokes / Recent Jokes

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island. they reallize their only chance of survival is to swim 500 meters to shore so the redhead tries first but only gets 200 meters and drowns, then the brunette tries and gets 300 meters and drowns, finally the blonde gives it a go she gets 250 meters out and says," O crap its too far!" then she swims back to the island.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island. They reallize their only chance of survival is to swim 500 meters to shore so the redhead tries first but only gets 200 meters and drowns. Then the brunette tries and gets 300 meters and drowns. Finally the blonde gives it a go she gets 250 meters out and says, " O crap its too far!" then she swims back to the island.

One day this guy, who has been stranded on a desert island all alone for ten years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon. "It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself.

And as the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.

Suddenly, emerging from the surf comes this drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.

She approaches the stunned guy and asks, "How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"

"Ten years!" he says.

She reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pocket of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, and takes a long drag, and says, "Man, oh man!" "Is that ever good!"

She then asks him, "How long has it been since you've had a sip of bourbon?"

Trembling, he replies, "Ten Years!"

She more...

A blonde, burnette, and a redhead are stranded on an island and, they predicted that the island was about 20 miles away.So the burnette decides she could do it, so she starts swimming, she swims 5 miles gets tired,10 miles and drowns. The redhead decided if the brunette could make it she could.So she starts swimming, she swims, 10 miles, gets tired,15 miles and drowns.The blonde decided if they could make it then she could, so she starts swimming, she swims 15 miles, 19 miles, gets tired and swims back.

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead stranded on an island. Then they found a magic lamp, and each of them recieved a wish. The brunette wished that she could go home to her family, and the redhead wished the same thing. Finally it was the blondes turn. She wished that her friends could be with her on the island.

A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, "It's not a ship." The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, "It's not a boat." The speck gets even closer and he thinks, "It's not a raft." Then, out of the surf comes this gorgeous blonde woman, wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She comes up to the guy and says, "How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"
"Ten years!", he says.
She reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes.
He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag, and says, "Man, oh man! Is that good!"
Then she asked, "How long has it been since you've had a drink of whiskey?"
He replies, "Ten years!"
She reaches over, unzips her waterproof pocket on her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and gives it to him.
He takes a more...

Two lawyers had been stranded on a deserted island for several months. The only other thing on the island was the tall coconut tree, that provided them their food. Each day, one of the lawyers climbed to the top of the tree, to see if he could see a rescue boat coming. One day, the lawyer yelled down from the tree, "Wow! I can't believe my eyes! I don't believe this is true!" The lawyer on the ground was skeptical and said, "I think you're hallucinating and you should come down right now." So, the lawyer reluctantly climbed down the tree and told his friend that he had just seen a naked blonde woman floating face up headed toward their island. The other lawyer started to laugh, thinking his friend had surely lost his mind. But, within a few minutes, up to the beach floated a naked blonde woman, face up, totally unconscious. The two lawyers went over to her and one said to the other, "You know, we've been on this island for months now without a woman. It's been more...