Sucked Jokes

Three women, a blonde, a brunette and a redhead, entered a room where they saw a magic mirror. If you looked into the mirror and told the truth, you got a wish. If you told a lie, you got sucked into the mirror for eternity.
The redhead walked up to the mirror and said, "I think I am the most beautiful girl in the world." The mirror sucked her up.
Then, the brunette walked up to the mirror and said, "I think I am the most beautiful girl in the world." The mirror sucked her up.
Next, the blonde walked up to the mirror and said, "I think", and the mirror quickly sucked her up.

A brunette, redhead and blonde went to a fitness spa for some fun and relaxation. After a stimulating healthy lunch, all three decided to visit the ladies room and found a strange-looking woman sitting at the entrance who said, “Welcome to the ladies room.
Be sure to check out our newest feature: a mirror which, if you look into it and say something truthful, you will be awarded with a wish. But, be warned, for if you say something false, you will be sucked into the mirror to live in a void of nothingness for all eternity! ” The three women quickly entered and upon finding the mirror, the brunette said, “I think I’m the most beautiful of us three” and in an instant she was surrounded by a pile of money.
The redhead stepped up and said “I think I’m the most talented of us three” and she suddenly found the keys to a brand new Lexus in her hands. Excited over the possibility of having a wish come true, the blonde looked into the mirror and said, “I think…” more...

There is a mirror in a women's restroom in a restauraunt. If you say something truthful while looking into the mirror, you will receive 1 wish. If you say some that's not truthful the mirror will suck you in.
First this fine looking brunette walks in. She takes a look at herself in the mirror and says, "I think I'm the prettiest women in the world." And just like that she's sucked in.
Next this amazingly beautiful redhead women saunters in, looks in the mirror, and says, "I think I'm the prettiest women in the world." Of course, the mirror sucks her in.
Next this fine looking, pencil thin black-haired women walks in, looks at herself in the mirror, and says, "I think I'm the prettiest women in the world." She's sucked into the mirror with the rest of them.
Then the cutest little blonde you've ever seen walks in, looks at herself in the mirror, and says, "I think..." And she's sucked in herself.

Greg lives above a bar, and one day he was walking up the stairs after losing his job. A man comes up to him and says, "You are looking really down. I know how to make you feel better. Watch this. I'll jump off the 4th story and be sucked in the 2nd."

He jumps off and was sucked in through the 2nd story window.

"Wow, that was cool, I'm gonna do it!" says Greg.

Greg jumps off the roof and landed hard on the ground, dead. The man who was safe in the 2nd story walked down to the bar and orders a drink.

The bartender says to him, "Superman, you shouldn't mess with people's minds like that."

Three men go into a whore house. The first one goes up to a hooker and says "What can I get for $100?" The hooker motions for him to follow her into a room. For the next half hour the other two men hear a fair amount of "Ooohing" and "Ahhing"... When he comes out, the men ask what she did to him. He tells them that she put chocolate ice cream on his dick and sucked it off. The second man pays $1000 and goes in the room with the hooker. He comes out half an hour later and tells the other two men that she put chocolate ice cream, caramel, and whooped cream on it and sucked it off. So the third man goes in with $10, 000. The men hear sounds from the room. Moaning and groaning and then they hear a loud yell coming from the man. He comes out holding onto his crotch and says in agony, "She put on ice cream and syrup and whooped cream and a cherry on top. It looked so good I decided to have a bite myself!"