Superman Jokes / Recent Jokes

superman wears a chuck norris t-shirt

FRIEND 1: YOU KNOW I BELIVE SUPERMAN IS AN INDIAN
FRIEND 2: WHY IS THAT?
FRIEND 1: BECAUSE ONLY IN INDIA CAN MEN TRAVEL FASTER THAN TRAINS

Superman was feeling bored after a long break of crime fighting & wanted to go out & party so he called Batman to ask if he wanted to go to a club & pick up some girls. Batman said Robin was ill & he had to look after him. A little disappointed, Superman called Spiderman to see if he fancied a few beers. Spiderman told him he had a date with Catwoman. As a last resort, Superman flew over to Wonderwoman's apartments to see if she was free. As he landed on her balcony, he saw Wonderwoman naked on the bed with her legs open. Superman thought to himself "I'm faster than a speeding bullet, I could be in there, have sex & out again before she knew what was happening." So Superman did his super thing in a split second & flew off happily. Meanwhile on the bed, Wonder woman said "Did you hear anything?" "No!" said the Invisible Man, "But my ass hurts"!

One day superman was flying around trying to think of things to do. He was bored and had no one to talk to so decided to call up some old friends.
He first called spider man and said, "Hey how are you doing, I have not seen you for awhile and thought you might like to hang out." Spider man told him that he was awfully busy and just happen to be in hot pursuit of bad guys at that very moment. He was in the middle of climbing a wall to catch some crooks and was talking on his cell phone so had to go. Superman was beginning to get bummed.
He thought and thought and suddenly came up with Batman and Robin so decided to call. He got them on the Bat phone and said, "Hey guys I'm just out flying around and thought that you guys would like to go chase some girls around for a little while." Batman and Robin said they were sorry but did not have time, they were in the middle of chasing the Joker in their Bat Mobile and really could not talk. "What should I go more...

Batman once wrote on the wall, "Superman is a wimp."
The next day, Superman wrote "Batman is Bruce Wayne."

Girl, "Oh, Superman I love you so much!"
Superman,"I don't blame you."