Survey Jokes / Recent Jokes

Millions of British drivers use traffic lights and jams as the perfect opportunity to pick up a hot date and sometimes even a marriage partner, according to a survey.

Up to 2 million UK motorists every day openly flirt while driving, the survey shows.

Half-a-million sleep with someone after initially spotting them during a road trip and as many 150, 000 have met their husband or wife in
traffic.

On-the-road flirting is most common in Wales, where over 60 per cent of drivers admit to exchanging sultry glances with others from behind the wheel, according to the survey of motorists carried out by car company Vauxhall.

Courtesy - Reuters

In a survey of American women, when asked, "Would you sleep
with President Clinton?" 86% replied, "Not again"

A new government 10 year survey cost $3, 000, 000, 000 revealed that 3/4 of the people in America make up 75% of the population. According to recent surveys, 51% of the people are in the majority. Did you know that 87. 166253% of all statistics claim a precision of results that is not justified by the method employed? 80% of all statistics quoted to prove a point are made up on the spot. According to a recent survey, 33 of the people say they participate in surveys. Q: What do you call a statistician on drugs? A: A high flyer. Q: How many statisticians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 1-3, alpha =. 05There is no truth to the allegation that statisticians are mean. They are just your standard normal deviates. Q: Did you hear about the statistician who invented a device to measure the weight of trees? A: It's referred to as the log scale. Q: Did you hear about the statistician who took the Dale Carnegie course? A: He improved his confidence from. 95 to. 99. Q: Why don't more...

A worldwide survey has been carried out with the following question:"PLEASE, GIVE US YOUR OPINION ON THE LACK OF FOOD IN THE REST OF THEWORLD"No result was achieved, since the following problems were facedduring the survey's implementation:1. In Western Europe no one knew what is "lack"2. In Africa no one knew what is "food"3. In Eastern Europe no one knew what is "opinion"4. In South America no one knew what is "please"5. In the USA no one knew what is "rest of the world"

In a recent survey, 4% of men preferred fat legs; 6% preferred skinny legs; while 90% preferred something in between.

In a recent survey, participants were asked: "Who made women?"
They asked a artist, and he said: "It would have to be anm artist. Look at how all those beautiful curves fit together, and how well rounded it looks. It is both pleasing to eye and the soul."
Fair enough, they thought, and went on to the engineer. "It must most certainly be an engineer", this man responded, "for it responds with unerring accuracy. Press this, that happens, do this, and you get this response."
Mmm, this is an even better answer, they decided, but, to keep the survey unbiased, they asked Little Johnie.
"It could only have been the goddamn City Council", was his reply.
"Huh? Why the City Council?"
"Only those stupid morons would put a carnival right next to a sewage outlet."

A survey was taken in Washington, DC which asked 1500 women whether or not they would like to have sex with Bill Clinton.
Eighty percent of the women responded "Never again!"