Swallows Jokes / Recent Jokes

There is legend that goes like this: In a bar in New York there is a magical mirror If you go up to it and tell it the truth it will grant you a wish If you lie - poof it swallows you up.
A brunette, a blonde and a redhead walk into this bar. They head straight for the mirror. The redhead goes first and says "I think I'm the most beautiful woman on Earth" Poof- the mirror swallows her up.
The brunette goes up to the mirror and says "I think I'm the sexiest woman on Earth" Poof - the mirror swallows her up.
Last, the blonde goes up to the mirror says " I think... " Poof!!

An Oregonian, a Californian, and a Texan were out camping. They were lazing around the campfire when the Texan pulled out a bottle of tequila and after taking a couple of swallows, threw the bottle in the air, pulled out his six-shooter, and neatly shot the bottle. The Californian noted that there was still some tequila left in the bottle, but the Texan replied,' That's okay, we have plenty of tequila where I come from.'

The Californian promptly brought out his bottle of White Zinfandel, took two swallows, threw it up in the air, and shot it with a Glock 9mm pistol with the 17-round magazine, stating:' We have plenty of wine where I come from.'

The Oregonian took all this in and finally opened a bottle of Henry's Blue Boar Irish Ale. He downed the entire bottle, threw it up in the air, shot the Californian with a 12-guage Mossberg he kept around for the birds, and deftly caught the bottle. The Texan's jaw dropped nearly to his silver belt buckle and his eyes more...

Legend has it that there is a bar in New York where, in the ladies room, there is a very special mirror. If one stands in front of the mirror and tells the truth, one is granted a wish. However, if one tells a lie... Poof. They are instantly swallowed up by the mirror, never to be seen again.
Sooooo, a redhead of questionable looks walks into the ladies room, stands before the mirror and says, "I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world." Poof. The mirror swallows her.
Next, a rather large brunette stands before the mirror and says, "I think I'm the sexiest woman alive." Poof. The mirror swallows her.
Then, an absolutely gorgeous blonde comes in and stands before the mirror and says, "I think..." Poof.