Swam Jokes / Recent Jokes

Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were swimming around in the sea - one called Justin and the other called Christian.

The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that patrolled the area. Finally, one day during a tropical storm, Justin said to Christian "I'm bored and frustrated at being a prawn, I wish I was a shark - then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten..."

As Justin had his mind firmly on becoming a predator, a flash of lightning hit the water and, lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time went on and Justin found himself becoming bored and lonely as a shark. All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realize that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight. During the next tropical storm, Justin figured that the same lightning force more...

A redhead, brunette and a blond went to the doctor. As they sat in the waiting room, the redhead got bored and went to the small fishbowl in the middle of the room where a goldfish swam around happily.
The redhead stared at the goldfish and the fish also stared back. After 1 minute, the redhead tilted her head to the left and the fish swam in that direction. She tilted her head to the right and the fish also swam to the right.
The brunette saw this trick, was impressed and asked the redhead how she did it. "Easy", replied the redhead. "It's just mind over matter."
So, the brunette stared at the fish and the fish also stared back. After 3 minutes, the brunette tilted her head to the left and the fish swam in that direction. She tilted her head to the right and the fish also swam to the right.
The blond, seeing this trick, was also impressed and asked the brunette how she did it. "Easy", replied the brunette. "It's just mind over more...

Once upon a time, there were three mad men and they had to cross a river which was 100 km long. There was no island in
Between and they had to swim and pass it. So the first man started. He swam 25km, got tired and drowned. Then the secnd man
Went, swam for 50 km, got tired and drowned. then the last man tried, he swm for 50 km and thought," i don't want to die. so i
Will go back home." so he went back 50 km.

Once, there were three guys stranded on an island, and the mainland was 100 miles away.
The first guy swam 25 miles, and drowned.
The second guy swam 50 miles, and drowned.
The third guy swam 99 miles, and said,"I'm tired. I think I'll swim back."

There were 3 people stranded on an island, a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about 20 miles to shore. So she announced, "I'm going to try to swim to shore." So she swam out five miles, and got really tired. She swam out ten miles from the island, and she was too tired to go on, so she drowned.

The second one, the redhead, said to herself, "I wonder if she made it. "I guess it's better to try to get to the mainland than stay here and starve." So she attempts to swim out. The redhead had a lot more endurance than the brunette, as she swam out 10 miles before she even got tired. After 15 miles, she was too tired to go on, so she drowned.

Finally, the blonde thought to herself, "I wonder if they made it! I think I'd better try to make it, too." So she swam out 5 miles, ten miles, 15 miles, NINETEEN miles from the island. The shore was just in sight, but she said, more...

Joe's chemistry teacher wanted to teach his ninth grade class a lesson on the evils of liquor so he produced a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.

"Observe" he told his class as he began to put one of the worms in the glass of water. This worm swam about freely and looked as happy as can be. He then put the second worm in the glass of whiskey and it to swam about for a moment but then started to shake and fell to the bottom dead.

"Now" he asked "What lesson can we learn from this experiment?"

"That's easy," replied Joe. "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

One day two men were fishing, when a Game Warden slipped up on themand asked
to see their fishing licences.One of the men took off running in . So
the warden started chasinghim. He ran after the man up and down the
side of the river, thru the swamp, up the side of a mountain, the man swam across the
river with the warden right behind him . Then he swam back across the river with the warden still right behind him.Finaly after about three miles of chasnig the game warden caught up with the man, bleeding and out of breath the warden asked to see his fishing licence. The man reached in his pocket and pulled out his licence and
handed it to the warden.And the warden asked why did you run? The man just looked at the warden and smiled and said the other guy didn't have his licence.