Tasks Jokes / Recent Jokes

There were three princes and they were all after this one princess. So the kings says "the
one who will marry my daughter is the one that fulfils these three tasks". The three tasks were
1)to swim a mile
2) to jump over a puddle that was 10 feet long and
3) to fuck a cow.
So the first prince, he tries to swim a mile, but as soon as he gets into the water (because he can't swim for shit). The second
prince, well he swims a mile and jumps over the 10 feet long puddle, but can't fuck the cow
(because he has no clue of what fucking actually is). Now, the third prince, he swims a mile,
jumps over the puddle, and he fucks the cow (and he fucked the cow real good). So, the kings say
"o. k., now you can marry my daughter". The third prince says, "forget your daughter, i want the
cow"!!!

Logg's Rebuttal to Gray's Law: 'n+1' trivial tasks take twice as long as 'n' trivial tasks.

a guy walks into a bar and sees a jug of money sitting on the tablE he says to the bartender "whats that money for" the bartender says "well its a contest you put in some loose change and then you get 3 tasks if you complete them all you win the money" the man says "ok sounds good" he put some money in the jug and asked the bartender for the 1st task the bartender replied "ok see that big biker dude over there... well you got to knok him out with one punch" so the man walks over and knocks him out with one punch! go back to the bartender and says "that was easy give me the last 2 tasks" the bartender replies "there is a dog in the back with a sore tooth you have to go pull it and there is an 80 year old women upstairs lookin for some sex she hasnt got any in a long time" the man says "no problem" he goes to the back with the dog and all the bartender hears is yelping and crying. the man comes oput and says " OK more...

A man walks into a bar and finds a jar full of money on the counter. He asks the bartender what it's for. The bartender replies, "Every night we have a contest that you have to complete three tasks to win all the money in the jar."The man asks, "What are the tasks?""First, you have to go over to Jimmy the bouncer and knock him out with one hit. Then, well, there's a pitbull out back and you have to pull its blunt tooth out. Finally, the bosses wife is up stairs and you have to go pleasure her, but you have to put down ten dollars to play." said the bartender."Damn." says the man. Later that night, after several drinks, the man smacks down a ten dollar bill and says, "I'm in."He walks over to the bouncer and swings. One hit he's out cold. The man falls flat on his face also, but gets up and walks out back. All you hear is the dog howling. Then the man steps back in, goes over to the bartender and asks, "Now where's that lady with more...

Lieberman’s Law: Everybody lies, but it doesn’t matter, because nobody listens.
Logg’s Rebuttal to Gray’s Law: ‘n+1' trivial tasks take twice as long as ‘n’ trivial tasks.
Lorenz’s Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
Lynch’s Law: When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.
Manly’s Maxim: Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
Mason’s First Law of Synergism: The one day you’d sell your soul for something, souls are a glut.
May’s Law: The quality of correlation is inversely proportional to the density of control. (The fewer the data points, the smoother the curves.)