Tax Jokes / Recent Jokes

It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living.

Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

Laughing stock - cattle with a sense of humor.

You can't have everything, where would you put it?

Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.

The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish more...

A blonde goes into the drug store to buy some rubbers (so she can practice safe sex). She walks up to the pharmacist and asks, "How much for a box of rubbers?" "They're $1 for a box of 3," he replied, "Plus 6 cents for the tax." "Oh," said the blonde, "I wondered how they kept them on."

The difference between the short and long income tax forms is simple. If you use the short form, the government gets your money. If you use the long form, the tax advisor gets your money.

A couple of weeks after hearing a sermon on Psalms 51: 2-4 (knowing my own hidden secrets) and Psalm 52: 3-4 (lies and deceit), a man wrote the following letter to the IRS:

"I have been unable to sleep, knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I understated my taxable income, and have enclosed a check for $150.
If I still can't sleep, I will send the rest."

What is the difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion? The jail walls.

What's the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector?
The taxidermist only takes the skin.

Why won't sharks attack tax inspectors? Professional courtesy.