Taxes Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Gettysburg Address Is 269 Words, The Declaration Of Independence Is 1, 337 Words, And The Holy Bible Is Only 773, 000 Words. However, The Us Tax Law Has Grown From 11, 400 Words In 1913, To 7 Million Words Today.

There Are At Least 480 Different Tax Forms, Each With Many Pages Of Instructions.

Even The Easiest Form, The 1040ez Has 33 Pages In Instructions, And All In Fine Print.

The Irs (Internal Revenue Service - Us Taxing Authority) Sends Out 8 Billion Pages Of Forms And Instructions Each Year. Laid End To End, They Would Stretch 28 Times Around The Earth.

Nearly 300, 000 Trees Are Cut Down Yearly To Produce The Paper For All The Irs Forms And Instructions.

American Taxpayers Spend $200 Billion And 5. 4 Billion Hours Working To Comply With Federal Taxes Each Year, More Than It Takes To Produce Every Car, Truck, And Van In The United States.

The Burden Of Compliance Is The Equivalent To A Staff Of 3 Million People more...

REVENUE CANADA *T1-SIMPLIFIED TAX FORM
New Simplified Tax Form for 2000 Taxes
1. How much money did you make in 2000?
2. Send it to us.

Tony died and was sent to be judged. He was told that he had cheated on his income taxes, and that the only way he could get into heaven would be to sleep with a stupid, butt-ugly woman for the next five years and enjoy it. Tony decided that this was a small price to pay for an eternity in heaven. So off he went with this woman, pretending to be happy.

As he was walking along, he saw his friend Carlos up ahead. Carlos was with an even uglier woman than he was with. When he approached Carlos he asked him what was going on, and Carlos replied "I cheated on my income taxes and scammed the government out of a lot of money." They both shook their heads in understanding and figured that as long as they have to be with these women, they might as well hang out together to help pass the time.

Now Tony, Carlos, and their two beastly women were walking along, minding their own business when Tony and Carlos saw their friend Jon up ahead, with an absolutely drop more...

There is only one way to kill capitalism: taxes, taxes, and more
taxes.

New Republican GOP agenda - the Top Ten House Republican initiatives:
Eliminate the Department of Health and Human Services, all Occupational Safety and Health laws and regulations, and Luxury Taxes, and use the savings to eliminate the corporate income tax.
Restore the House on Un-American Activities Committee (Robert Dornan to be Chairman) and eliminate the Ethics Committee.
Provide tax credits for home schooling.
Repeal all gun control laws and provide tax incentives for private militia.
Eliminate all Federal election funding and regulations, and repeal the voting rights act.
Right to Work Act: Repeal anti-competition laws and outlaw labor monopoly groups.
Pass a "anti-flag burning" constitutional amendment to protect patriotic emblems such as "Old Glory," the "Stars-and-Bars," "Star-Spangled Banner," "Dixie," and maybe the "Battle Hymn of the Republic."
Provide tax credit for mothers to more...

20 eunuchs were hired by the impoverished city of Patna to collect taxes, because they are believed to be stubborn and not take no for an answer.

Although, they are relatively flexible when it comes to genitalia removal.

Special To The Star – Bethlehem officials refused comment, but 3 men on camels said DYFS took custody of an infant born in a barn. The terrible conditions found are the basis for a hearing on whether the parents are guilty of child abuse. One of the men, Gaspar, was arrested when police found he had 50 g. of frankincense wrapped as a gift. He is being charged with intent to distribute.
In a related story, a boy, ox and lamb were arrested for disturbing the peace after guests of a nearby inn complained about incessant drumming. Police held the boy and his drum as evidence. The ox and lamb were released after it was determined they were only keeping time.


Paternity Questioned
The story surrounding "Stable Boy" got more confusing late yesterday when Joseph produced documentation he had undergone a vasectomy 2 years ago and accused his wife of having an affair. Mary, the mother of "Stable Boy", refused to provide any explanation and is now more...