Technology Jokes / Recent Jokes

"It was clear that the new secretary was not used to working with computers - the computer screen had corrector fluid all over it."

Microsoft acquires Electrolux, makes numerous design revisions.

Finally releases a product that doesn't suck.

If we believe in data structures, we must believe in independent (hence simultaneous) processing. For why else would we collect items within a structure? Why do we tolerate languages that give us the one without the other?

"Computers could never completely replace humans. They may become capable of artificial intelligence, but they will never master real stupidity like we have."

In a 5 year period we get one superb programming language. Only we can't control when the 5 year period will be.

Systems analyst: It's time you upgraded your computer network.

Business manager: Oh, we can't get rid of this computer.

Systems analyst: With a new system, your operation will be faster. Why would you want to keep this old computer?

Business manager: It knows too much.

Over the centuries the Indians developed sign language for communicating phenomena of interest. Programmers from different tribes (FORTRAN, LISP, ALGOL, SNOBOL, etc.) could use one that doesn't require them to carry a blackboard on their ponies.