Telephone Jokes / Recent Jokes
Yo mama's like...
- Yo mama's like a T. V., even a two-year-old could turn her on. - Yo mama's like a bowling ball. She's picked up, fingered, thrown in the gutter, and then comes back for more. - Yo mama's like a rifle... four cocks and she's loaded. - Yo mama's like a bubble gum machine... five cents a blow. - Yo mama's like Chinese food... sweet, sour, and cheap. - Yo mama's like a birthday cake, everybody gets a piece. - Yo mama's like Burger King... Your way, right away. - Yo mama's like a squirrel, she's always got some nuts in her mouth. - Yo mama's like 7-Eleven... open all night, hot to go, and for 89 cents you can get a slurpy. - Yo mama's like a toilet, fat, white, and smells like shit. - Yo mama's like the Bermuda Triangle, they both swallow a lot of seamen. - Yo mama's like a street lamp, you can find her turned on at night on any street corner. - Yo mama's like a telephone booth, open to the public, costs a quarter, and guys go in and out all day. - Yo mama's more...
Harry was madly in love with Betty, but couldn't pluck up enough courage to pop the question face to face. Finally he decided to ask her on the telephone.' Darling!' he blurted out,' will you marry me?'' Of course, I will, you silly boy,' she replied,' who is it speaking?'
Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your
nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least
accessible corner.
Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy
signal.
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you
had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in
will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone
rings.
Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know
increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone more...
What asks no question but demands an answer? A doorbell or a ringing telephone.
The policeman arrived at the scene of an accident to find that a car had struck a telephone pole. Searching for witnesses, he discovered a pale, nervous young man in work clothes who claimed he was an eyewitness.
"Exactly where were you at the time of the accident?" inquired the officer.
"Mister," exclaimed the telephone lineman, "I was at the top of the pole!"
Once A Man Was Killing Bees, So, His Wife Asks Him How Many Bees Have You Killed.
Husband: 5, 3 Male And 2 Female.
Wife: How Do You Know The Gender.
Husband: 3 Were Sitting On Beer Bottles And 2 On The Telephone.