Tender Jokes / Recent Jokes
Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender missionary. I've baked' em, I've roasted' em, I've stewed' em, I've barbequed' em, I've even tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender." The second cannibal asks, "What kind of missionary do you use?" The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and their sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads." "Ah ha!" he replies. "No wonder.. those are friars!"
Two cannibals meet one day...The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender Missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. Just can't seem to get them tender."The second cannibal asks, "What kind of Missionary do you use?"The reply, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around their waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads.""Ah, Ha!" the second cannibal replies, "No wonder-those are fryers!"
a group of 3 blonde walk into a bar a are chanting 64 days 64 days 64 day... the bar tender looks at them briefly then goes back to work then the next night the 3 blondes go into the chanting 64 days 64days 64 days .. again the bar tender looks at them then goes back to work once again the 3 blondes go back into the bar chanting 64 days 64 days 64 days .. finally the bar tender gets up his courage and questions why are u ladies chant 64 days? they respond we were doing a puzzel and it said 5 to 7 years and we did it in 64 days.
there was a duck bar and a duck walkes up an the bar tender says what your name and he said larry and Ive been in and out of puddles all day and then a nother duck wakes up and the bar tender says whats your name he said jarry and Ive been in and out of puddles all day and another duck walkes up and the bar tender says larry, jarry you must be gary he said no my names puddels.
Everybody knows the famous under creek/sea tunnel joining England and France. Before it's construction, the tenders were invited from various construction companies by giving newspaper ads throughout the world. Banta Singh came across one such ad and he decided to fill the tender. On the day of opening the tenders everybody was surprised to find Banta Singh's tender at it's very lowest. Ohere tenders were quoting billions of pounds, Banta Sing had offered to do the job for just 10000 pounds. Now, as per the rule Banta was to get the contract. Before giving works order to Banta Singh, the officer asked BantaSingh as to how he could afford to work at such a low budget. Banta Singh said,"look, back home, there is my brother, Santa Singh.I will call him here. We will take two shovels. I will start diging from English bank and Santa Singh will start digging from French bank. The moment we meet, you get a tunnel." The dumbstruck officer asked with courage," and if you don't more...
A guy walks into a bar with his 3 ducks, puts them each on a stoll and asks the bar tender to watch them while he goes outside and uses the payphone. the bar tender agrees and the guy walks outside. thinking he would be polite the bar tender walked up to the first duck and said "whats your name little fella?" the duck replies "my name is huey" the bar tender then asks "and how are you today huey?" huey replies "im great ive been in and out of puddles all day" the bar tender then moves on to the second duck and asks the same questions. the duck replies "my name is luey and ive been n and out of puddles all day too." the bar tender mover on to the third duck, thinks for a while and says "let me guess, your name is duey, youve had a great day and youve been in and out of puddles all day too?" the duck looks at him and says "no my name is puddles and ive had a shit of a day"
Once there was a guy in a bar. He was drinking one beer after another. Finally, after all of the beer he had to piss. So he asked the Bar tender where the bathroom was. The Bar tender told him to go down the hall make a right, then make another right. About 5 minutes later the bar tender hears, "Ahhh Yeah." So the bar tender goes down to the bathroom and asks the guy what his problem is. The guy said, "Every time I flush the toilet it squeezes my balls!" The bar tender busts through the door and the guy was pissing in a mop bucket.