Tennis Jokes / Recent Jokes
A man walking in a park found a tenis ball which he picked up and put in his pocket. Later he met a woman who asked what the bulge was in his pants.
"
Tennis ball"
replied the man.
"
Oh"
she said, "
That must hurt. I had tennis elbow once and it was very painful"
If tennis players get tennis elbow, and squash players get squash knees, what do gynecologists get? Tunnel vision!
US tennis legend John McEnroe expressed his concern on Friday that organized crime, such as the Russian mafia, could be infiltrating tennis.
McEnroe stated, "We all know what happened when rednecks infiltrated Nascar. What's next, gays infiltrating mens iceskating?"
A man complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts. I guess I
should see a doctor. His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a
computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and
cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the
computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do
about it. It only costs $10. 00." The man figured he had nothing to lose,
so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding
the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. 00. The
computer started making some noises and the various lights started
flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper on which
was printed:
You have tennis elbow
Soak your arm in warm water.
Avoid heavy labor
It will be better in two weeks.
Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology more...
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Tennis.
Tennis who?
Tennis-see! Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Tennis.
Tennis who?
Tennis Five plus Five.
Bob complained to his friend "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10. 00."
Bob figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. 00. The computer started making some noises and the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed:
You have tennis elbow Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy labor It will be better in two weeks.
Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be more...