Tight Jokes / Recent Jokes

A smile is like tight underwear...it makes your cheeks go up.

After the Class was over the teacher had to help putting shoes to little Thomas as usual. One fine day his shoes were very tight the young teacher had a hell of a time to put them on. When al last the job was done.
1) Thomas points out to the young lady that the shoes were on wrong feet.
2) Teacher looked at them carefully and they were really on the wrong feet, so she fought removing them and fit them on again correctly and carefully.
3) Then Thomas:- Those are really not my shoes.
4) Teacher looked at him terrifying and said' 'WHY COULD'NT YOU TELL THAT BEFORE'' She removed them after a heavy struggle.
5) Then Thomas told her that these shoes belong to his brother, because it was cold his Mom wanted him to wear them this Morning.
6) Finely the Teacher holding her mouth tight, not letting out any nasty words, breathing hard and got his shoes inserted again.
7) And then the young exhausted teachers told Thomas Okay fine now put your gloves on hurry more...

This couple were in bed getting busy when the girl places the guys hand onto her pussy. "Put your finger in me..." she asks him. So he does without hesitation, as she starts moaning. "Put two fingers in...", she says. So in goes another one. She's really starting to get worked up when she says, "Put your whole hand in!". The guy's like, "Ok!". So he has his entire hand in, when she says moaning aloud "Put both your hands inside of me!!!". So the guy puts both of his hands in! "Now clap your hands..." commands the girl. "I can't", says the guy. The girl looks at him and says "See, I told you I had a tight pussy!".

A man was seen walking in a drunkard manner, with anger writ large on his face, wearing a pair of somewhat tight shoes. A Haryanavi passerby who happened to go that way, stopped and asked the man, "From where did you buy such tight shoes?"
"Ae Mister, you had better mind your own business. I've plucked them from a tree! But I wonder what's that to do with you."
"Absolutely nothing. But friend, you made some haste. If you had plucked them two or three months hence they would have definitely fitted your feet well," said the Haryanavi mockingly.

As the bus pulled up, Angie realized she was going to have a difficult time getting on. Her dress was too tight for her to step up, her hands were full of packages, and the line of people behind her did not seem to be in a charitable mood.
She realized that the best thing to do was to try to loosen her dress so, with great effort, she stretched her hand behind her and pulled the zipper down halfway. When that didn't seem to help, she pulled it down the rest of the way.
Just then the bus pulled up and, still unable to ascend, she was both shocked and offended when a man standing behind her picked her up and put her on the bus.
Turning, she growled, "What right did you have to touch me?"
The man climbed on and said, "Well, after you pulled my fly down I kind of figured we were good friends."

Q. What do tight pants and a cheap motel have in common?
A. No ball room

When I was a little boy, my family did not have a lot of money.
My father had a reasonably well paying job, but with four kids and
a dog, money was often tight. This is not to say that we were
deprived or unhappy. Our family did many activities together, but
our favorite was camping, which we did year-round, blazing heat or
freezing cold.
It was a great site to see the whole clan scrambling to get every-
thing together for a weekend trip. The whole family then piled
into our Chevy station wagon with a dog bigger than the three
smallest children put together. Dad would then tie down our
trusty tent to the top of the Chevy and off we would go.
Our tent was amazing in and of itself. It was an army surplus
tent, large enough for the whole family plus dog. It had survived
though rainstorms, snowstorms, and windstorms. It had twice been
uprooted from its stakes in high winds. (Makes me wonder why we
went camping in more...