Titanic Jokes / Recent Jokes

TITANIC VIDEO: $9.99 on Internet.
CLINTON VIDEO: $9.99 on Internet.

TITANIC VIDEO: Over 3 hours long.
CLINTON VIDEO: Over 3 hours long.

TITANIC VIDEO: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
CLINTON VIDEO: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

TITANIC VIDEO: Villain: White Star Line.
CLINTON VIDEO: Villain: Ken Starr.

TITANIC VIDEO: Jack is a starving artist.
CLINTON VIDEO: Bill is a B.S. artist.

TITANIC VIDEO: In one part, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
CLINTON VIDEO: Ditto for Bill.

TITANIC VIDEO: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
CLINTON VIDEO: Ditto for Monica.

TITANIC VIDEO: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
CLINTON VIDEO: Let's not go there.

TITANIC VIDEO: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
CLINTON VIDEO: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

TITANIC VIDEO: Behind the more...

In the current film, Titanic, the character Rose is shown giving the
finger to Jack (another character).Many people who have seen the film,
question whether "giving the finger" was done around the time of the
Titanic disaster, or was it a more recent gesture invented by some defiant
seventh-grader. According to research, here's the true story:
Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory
over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured
English soldiers. Without the middle finger it would be impossible to draw
the renowned English longbow and therefore be incapable of fighting in the
future. This famous weapon was made of the native English Yew tree, and
the act of drawing the longbow was known as "plucking the yew" (or "pluck
yew").
Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and
began mocking the French by waved their middle more...

Three people were standing on the Titanic, An American, a Brit and an belgian. It was almost sinking. The captain told everyone to go into the liveboats. The Brit yelled "Women and children first". The American said "Screw the women and children" and the Belgian answered "Huh, do we have enough time left to do that?"

What kind of coffee did they have on the Titanic?
Sanca

#1
Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die.
#2
Historically, a blue ribbon has been awarded for first prize.
#3
The motto of M-G-M movie studios is Art for Art's Sake.
#4
The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named "Volney."
#5
It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.
#6
The Titanic was the first ship to use the SOS signal.
#7
The Mercedes-Benz motto is 'Das Beste oder Nichts' meaning 'the best or nothing'.
#8
The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones.
#9
There are more Rolls Royce cars in Hong Kong than anywhere else in the world.
#10
X-ray technology has shown there are 3 different versions of the Mona Lisa under the visible one.
#11
The pupil of the eye expands as much as 45 percent when a person looks at something pleasing.
#12
It takes only about 8 minutes more...

A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a chinese man and punches him in the face. "Owch!" the chinese man says. "What was that for?" "That was for Pearl Harbor," the Jewish man says. "But I'm Chinese!" "Chinese, Japanese, what's the difference?" And the jewish man sits back down. Then, the chinese man walks up to the Jewish man and punches him in the face. "Ouch!" the Jewish man says. "What was that for?" "That was for the Titanic," the chinese man says. "But that was an iceberg!" "Ice berg, Goldberg, what's the difference?"

Q: What is the difference between a blonde and "The Titanic"?
A: They know how many men went down on "The Titanic".