Towards Jokes / Recent Jokes

One beautiful morning an atheist was walking through the forest,
admiring nature's beauties. He looked up and saw the trees swaying in
the wind high above him, and he smiled. He saw the river glittering in
the sun, and it made him warm inside. He thought to himself that
mother nature had made a truly wonderful world.
The atheist walked a little farther down the path he had taken when
suddenly a bear jumped out of the bushes only a few yards ahead of
him. The bear looked hungry, it started growling and running towards
him.
Seeing the big bear bounding towards him he screamed in horror and
started running as fast as he could away from the bear. Knowing that
the bear would catch him and he had no chance, the atheist soon ran
out of breath and finally fell to the ground.
As the bear's shadow fell upon his face and his paws came down upon
his chest, the atheist screamed, "Oh help me god!"
Suddenly the trees that he so more...

Once upon a time, a cowboy that was supposed to be the bravest cowboy in the west walked into a saloon. Some men near him, start talking, and finally walk up to him and ask him to prove that he really is the bravest cowboy in the west.

The cowboy agreed and asked what he had to do. Then the men told him that there was a haunted coffin upstairs, and if he could overcome the coffin, he would surely be the bravest cowboy in the west.

As the cowboy reached the top of the stairs, he saw the coffin coming near him. This was way too much for him to handle. He ran out of the saloon and jumped on his horse. After he had gotten a good distance from the saloon, he looked back and to his astonishment, the coffin was floating in the air coming straight towards him.

Soon the cowboy and his horse were surrounded by a tall canyon. The cowboy jumped off of his horse and ran towards one of the canyon walls, with the coffin floating even faster towards him. He tried to more...

Thing to keep you occupied at the office while you avoid work!
ONE-POINT DARES
1. Run one lap around the office at top speed
2. Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other' non-player' must be in the toilet at the time).
3. Ignore the first five people who say' good morning' to you.
4. Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."
5. To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your head.
6. When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!"
7. Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, "Sorry, I really prefer it this way".
8. Walk sideways to the photocopier.
9. While riding in a lift, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.
THREE-POINTS DARES
1. Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with more...

Being court-martialled for his odd behaviour in the defence services, Ujaagar landed in Delhi Police instead. A class was in progress and an officer was explaining the situation:
'Imagine you're on duty when two cars smash into each other. You are just about to go to their aid when you notice a lorry hurtling down the hill towards the blind corner where the accident has occurred. You hear a scream and see that the shock of the crash has sent a pregnant woman on the pavement into premature labour. Meanwhile, a fireball from one of the car's petrol tanks is heading towards a crowded dhaaba full of people. What do you do?'
Silence pervaded the class when suddenly Ujaagar opened up and spoke,' Kama ki hai, apni vardi utaaro aur bheed main shaamil ho jaao.' (What do we need to do? Just slip off our uniforms and merge with the crowd.)

There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appears. Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle. He said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true."
The French wanted to start. He run towards the pool, jumped and shouted "WINE".
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and shouted, "VODKA" and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER". He was so contented with his beer pool.
The last is the American. He was running towards the pool when suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards the more...

It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer.
The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained possession. The Ants’ star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants’ goal when the Elephants’ left back came lumbering towards him. The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly. The referee stopped the game.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?
Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player? ”
The elephant replied, “Well, I didn’t mean to kill him - I was just trying to trip him up. ”

A man was walking through the Sahara desert, desperate for water, when he saw something, far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he walked towards the image, only to find a little old man sitting at a card table with a bunch of neckties laid out on it.
The man asked, "Please, I'm dying of thirst, can I have some water?"
The little old man replied "I don't have any water, but why don't you buy a tie? Here's one that goes nicely with your shirt."
The man shouted, "I don't want a tie, you idiot, I need water!"
"OK, don't buy a tie. But to show you what a nice guy I am, I'll tell you that over that hill there, about four miles, is a nice restaurant. Walk that way, they'll give you all the water you want."
The man thanked him and walked away towards the hill and eventually disappeared from view. Three hours later the man came crawling back to where the little old man was sitting behind his card table. He said, "I told more...