Traded Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Baltimore Orioles traded for Cubs prospect Felix Pie. The Orioles traded for Pie in an effort to land Prince Fielder.

Background: The hockey world is buzzing as former Pittsburgh Penguins superstar Mario Lemieux is expected to announce that he is coming out of retirement to play with the team he now owns.
[AP] - In a shocking development from the hockey world, hockey legend and superstar Mario Lemieux announced his come-back to the sport in an emotional press-conference at Mellon Arena today.
Not more than twenty minutes afterward, the Penguin great was immediatly traded to the Chicago Blackhawks for Tony Amonte, Mikael Nylander, Dean McAmmond and several undisclosed draft picks.
Craig Patrick, Penguins' general manager, was asked to explain the dealing of his boss, "I just wanted to do it, because it's really ironic. He still owns the Penguins and everything, but now he plays for Chicago! I mean... whoa! That's weird!"
Lemieux, seen in the Mellon Arena parking lot rather livid after he learned of his trade, tried his best to ease the situation, "It's my own damn fault. more...

The New York Mets traded Aaron Heilman for JJ Putz, marking the first time in history that a Putz was traded for a putz.

Two friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boy, come of age at thesame time. The Italian boy's father presents him with a new pistol.On the other side of town, at his bar Mitzvah, the Jewish boyreceives a beautiful gold watch. The next day at school, the two boysare showing each other what they got. They each liked what theother one got, so, they traded.That night, when the Italian boy is at home, his father sees himlooking at the watch. "Where did you getta thatta watch?" asks theman. The boy explains that he and Sammy had traded. The fatherblows his top. "Whatta you? Stupidda boy? Whatsa matta you!""Somma day, you maybe gonna getta married. Then maybe sommaday you gonna comma home and finda you wife inna bed withanother man. Whatta you gonna do then? Looka atta you watch andsay, 'How longa you gonna be?'"

David Wells was traded Thursday from the Boston Red Sox to the Padres, who believe the free-spirited lefty will provide the lift they need as they contend for a postseason berth.
Minutes after the trade announcement, several Boston area Dunkin Donuts flew their flags at half-staff to mourn the loss of their all time best customer.



Also mourning the Wells trade...
Every biker bar, rib joint, strip club, and asian fetish whorehouse in New England.