Trap Jokes / Recent Jokes
This guy was out playing his weekly round of golf when he hit
a shot into the trap off the 11th green. So he pulls out his sand wedge
and takes a swing at the ball only to hit something metallic underneath.
Being curious, he digs away the sand only to find what looks like Aladin's
Lamp. It's kind of dirty, so he takes out his golf towel to clean it off.
All of a sudden... POOF!... a genie apears from the lamp and says,
"Sir, you have freed me from the lamp! For this I will grant you 3 wishes!"
The man thinks for a moment and says, "You know, I have everything I could
possibly want. Give the wishes to someone else." He quickly putts out and
leaves for the 12th tee.
The genie is flabergasted. "To think that someone in this world could feel
so fulfilled that he could pass up not just 1 but 3 wishes! I know what
I'll do. To reward him, I'll grant him 3 things without him knowing. Now
lets see. What does every man more...
On the border of Russia and Poland there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a Russian farmer, while the other half belongs to a Polish man.
One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Russian man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his Polish neighbor.
"There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest."
"How do you know it's one of *our* wolves?" the Polish farmer asked.
"Well," the Russian replied, "he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped."
Ever hear about the blonde coyote who got a leg stuck in a trap -, "Ever hear about the blonde coyote who got a leg stuck in a trap -she chewed off three legs and was still stuck!
AAC Alter All CommandsAAD Alter All DataAAO Add And OverflowAAR Alter At RandomAB Add BackwardsABC AlphaBetize CodeABR Add Beyond RangeACC Advance CPU ClockACDC Allow Controller to Delete ContentsACDP Allow Controller to Die PeacefullyACQT Advance Clock to Quitting TimeADB Another Dumb BugAEE Absolve Engineering ErrorsAFF Add Fudge FactorAFHB Align Fullword on Halfword BoundaryAFP Abnormalize Floating PointAFR Abort Funny RoutineAFVC Add Finagle's Variable ConstantAGB Add GarBageAGWA Add and Get Wrong AnswerAI Add ImproperAIB Attack Innocent BystanderAIB Attack Innocent BystandersAISG Access and Improve Student GradeAMM Add Mayo and MustardAMM Answer My MailAMS Add Memory to SystemANC ANnoy ConsultantAOI Annoy Operator ImmediateAR Advance RudelyAR Alter RealityARN Add and Reset to Non-zeroARN Add and Reset to NonzeroARZ Add and Reset to ZeroAS Add SidewaysASQGSA ASCII Stupid Question, Get a Stupid ANSIAT Accumulate TriviaAWP Argue With ProgrammerAWTT Assemble With Tinker ToysBA Branch more...
there is a fly flying over a venus fly trap when tha venus fly trap thinks to itself if that fly drops 6in lower i can have the fly. then a bear comes along and says to himself if that fly drops 6in lower then the venus fly trap can have tha fly and i can get tha venus fly trap. then a hunter comes and says if that fly drops 6in lower then the venus fly trap can get tha fly the bear can get tha venus fly trap and i can shoot tha bear. then amouse comes and says if that fly drops 6in lower then tha venus flytrap can get tha fly the bear can get tha venus fly trap the hunter can shoot the bear and i can have the hunters sandwich. then a cat comes along and says if that fly drops 6in lower then the venus fly trap can get the fly the bear can have the venus fly trap the hunter can shoot the bear the mouse can get tha hunters sandwich and i can get tha mouse. then a dong comes along and says that if that fly drops 6in lower then the venus fly trap can get tha fly the bear can get the venus more...
A police officer had a perfect hiding place for watching for speeders along a well-traveled stretch of highway. The location, at a bend in the road, allowed him to hide his car out of sight of oncoming traffic while setting up his radar to nab any speeders who passed by. He had used this location successfully a number of times, especially on holidays, and decided to use it again one Labor Day weekend.
The officer arrived at his hiding place and set himself up, settling down to wait for the first speeders to appear. After a half hour or so the officer hadn't seen anybody speeding.
In fact most of the cars that passed him were traveling exactly at the speed limit, and some of the passengers in the passing cars were even smiling and waving at him. He couldn't believe this was happening since his hiding place was so well concealed.
Finally, after realizing that virtually all the passing cars knew he was there, the officer decided that something was wrong and went more...