Traveller Jokes / Recent Jokes
A traveller wandering on an island inhabited entirely by cannibals comes upon a butcher shop. This shop specialised in human brains differentiated according to source. The sign in the shop read:
Artists' Brains $9/lb Philosophers' Brains $12/lb Scientists' Brains $15/lb Economists' Brains $19/lb
Upon reading the sign, the traveller noted, "My those economists' brains must be popular!" To which the butcher replied, "Are you kidding! Do you have any idea how many economists you have to kill to get a pound of brains?!"
HA!. .. It's a *supply side* joke!
A commercial traveller was passing through a small town when he came upon a huge funeral procession. "Who died?" he asked a nearby local. "I`m not sure," replied the local, " but I think it`s the one in the coffin."
A girl goes to her doctor, because she's found some unusual green marks on her thighs.
After the doctor has examined the marks, she asks the girl some questions so that she can determine the cause.
"Do you have a boyfriend?" "Yes."
"Can you describe him?" "Ok; he's tall, dark, and works at the fairground."
"So he's a traveller?" "Yes, he is; any problems?"
"No, no. I do think his earrings may be made of brass, though."
A traveller and his wife leave their hotel room and go to the lobby to check out. The traveller puts down a $50 bill and asks for a receipt. The clerk says that his total bill is $75. The traveller explains that the sign advertises all rooms $50/night, tax included. He insisted that his bill is only $50 since he didn't make any telephone calls, didn't charge anything in the restaurant and didn't use the mini bar. The clerk advised that it's for the food that comes with every room.
"But we didn't consume any of the food", said the traveller.
"Well that's too bad. It was there and we charge for it", said the clerk.
"Well then, you owe $75", said the traveller.
"What for?" said the clerk.
"For screwing my wife last night", said the traveller.
The clerk explained that he didn't touch his wife.
"Well to bad, she was there!"
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A traveller was driving through Arkansas when he lost his way and got off the main highway.
As he drove by, he saw rows and rows of pigsties and pigpens and pigs running in fields and pigs wallowing in mud. Suddenly, his eye caught something really strange. He did a double take, muttered to himself and then looked a third time. He wondered if he had seen correctly - it looked like a pig with a wooden leg!
He found the lane to the farm and drove up into the farmyard, where he was met by the farmer. "Excuse me," the traveller said. "I was just driving by and looking at all your pigs, and I noticed something that I just had to stop and ask about. Tell me, did I see right? Is there really a pig out there with a wooden leg?"
The farmer smiled. "Oh, that would be old Caesar you saw. He's the finest pig a man could ever hope to have - and smart! Well, let me tell you a little about that pig. You see that barge down there on the river? more...