Trick Jokes / Recent Jokes
A drunk walks up to a barkeeper one day and says, "If I show you a trick will you give me a free drink?"
The Barkeep says "Depends on how good of a trick it is."
The Drunk reaches into his pocket and pulls out a frog and places him behind the piano. The frog starts to play the sweetest jazz riff
the barkeeper has ever heard. He pours the drunk his drink.
The drunk, after killing his drink says, "If I show you another trick can I have another free one?"
The barkeep says "If it is anything like that last one, you can drink free all night."
The drunk reaches into his other pocket, pulls out a rat, sets it on top of the piano, and the rat starts scatting along with the frog."
Impressed, the barkeeper starts to pour drinks as fast as the drunk can drink' em. After several hours, a big time Hollywood agent walks in, sees the act and franticaly asks the barkeeper who it belongs to.
The more...
Little Johnny greeted his grandmother with a big hug and said, "I'm so happy you're visiting us again, Grandma. Now maybe Daddy will do the trick he's been promising us."
"What trick is that, Johnny?" his confused grandmother asked.
"Well," Johnny replied, "I heard Daddy telling Mommy that he was going to climb the walls if you ever visited us again."
13. Saws a gummie bear in half, then puts it back together.
12. Insists that his magic won't work if he puts his clothes back on.
11. "The Amazing Kevorkian" is scaring the Hell out of Grandma.
10. Makes a bird appear for the kids by simply raising his middle finger.
9. Replaces pulling a rabbit out of his hat with the slightly racier pulling the "big snake" out of his pants.
8. She closes her eyes, then claims to be invisible.
7. His first and only trick: The Amazing Disappearing Bottle of Jagermeister
6. During one trick, screams "Pick a freakin' card already or I swear I'll blow the little birthday boy's head off!"
5. Begins by saying his first trick "relies on the magic of sweet, sweet love."
4. His biggest trick? Converting a sixer of Coors into "liquid gold" -- eventually.
3. Smoke emanating from more than just the more...
Here is a math trick so unbelievable that it will stump you. Personally I would like to know who came up with this and why that person is not running the country. I wonder what it means...
1. Grab a calculator. (You won't be able to do this one in your head)
2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code)
3. Multiply by 80
4. Add 1
5. Multiply by 250
6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number
7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again.
8. Subtract 250
9. Divide number by 2
Do you recognize the answer?
A priest decides to pay a visit to a nearby convent.
The convent is in a run-down neighborhood, and as the priest walks down the street several prostitutes approach and proposition him.
"Twenty bucks a trick!"
These solicitations embarrass the priest who lowers his head and hurries on until he gets to the convent.
Once inside he displays his naivet
Little Johnny was out on Halloween, trick-or-treating; dressed as "Rocky", complete with boxing gloves and satin shorts. He walked up to Mr. and Mrs. Foggybottom's door and rang the bell. Mrs. Foggybottom answered the door and Johnny said, "Trick or Treat!" Mrs. Foggybottom gave Johnny some candy and closed the door. Soon afterwards the bell rang again. It Little Johnny once more. "Aren't you the same' Rocky' who left my doorstep several minutes ago?" asked Mrs. Foggybottom. "Yes," he replied, "but now I'm the sequel. I'll be back three more times tonight, too."