Triumph Jokes / Recent Jokes
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. - David BissonetteA man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished. - Zsa Zsa GaborI'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa GaborWhen a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha GuitryMarriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - MontaigneAfter marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - - Hemant JoshiA successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. - Lana TurnerMarriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution. - Mae West"I was married by a judge... I should have asked for a jury." - George BurnsUnknown Author QuotesMarriage is more...
Because of the ugly business over at NBC, Triumph the InsultComic Dog is ready to walk. He’s actually sitting patiently by the front door.
Marriage has driven more than one man to sex.
Marriage is a ceremony that turns your dreamboat into a barge.
Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.
Marriage is a rest period between romances.
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
Marriage is a trip between Niagra Falls and Reno.
Marriage is an institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
Marriage is better when both the husband and wife decide that what they have is better than what they are missing.
Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out.
Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
Marriage is mind over matter; if the husband doesn't mind, it doesn't matter..
Marriage is not more...
Marriage has driven more than one man to sex.Marriage is a ceremony that turns your dreamboat into a barge.Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.Marriage is a rest period between romances.Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.Marriage is a trip between Niagra Falls and Reno.Marriage is an institution, but who wants to live in an institution? Marriage is better when both the husband and wife decide that what they have is better than what they are missing.Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out.Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.Marriage is mind over matter; if the husband doesn't mind, it doesn't matter..Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.Marriage is the high sea for which no more...
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Therefore...
Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.
Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent.
Do not marry a person that you know that you can live with; only marry someone that you cannot live without.
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Love is blind. Marriage is an institution for the blind.
Most people assume WWJD is for "What would Jesus do?" But the initials really stand for "What would Jesus drive?"
One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth because the Bible says "God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury."
But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo. The passage urges the Lord to "pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify them with your Storm."
Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks, because Moses' followers are warned not to go up a mountain "until the Ram's horn sounds a long blast."
Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn't like to talk about it. As proof, they cite a verse in St. John's gospel where Christ tells the crowd, "For I did not speak of my own Accord..."
Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced by a Bible passage declaring that "the roar of Moses' Triumph is heard in the more...