Turn Jokes / Recent Jokes
The 5 Levels of Drinking
Level 1:
It's 11:00 on a weeknight, you've had a few beers. You get up to leave because you have
work the next day and one of your friends buys another round. One of your unemployed
friends. Here at level I you think to yourself, "Oh come on, this is silly. Why, as long as I
get seven hours of sleep (snap fingers), I'm cool."
Level 2:
It's midnight. You've had a few more beers. You've just spent 20 minutes arguing against
artificial tuff. You get up to leave again, but at level
2, a little devil appears on your shoulder. And now you're thinking, "Hey! I'm out with
my friends! What am I working for anyway? These are the good times! Besides, as long
as I get five hours sleep (snaps fingers), I'm
COOl."
Level 3:
One in the morning. You've abandoned beer for tequila. You've just spent 20 minutes
arguing for artificial tuff. And now you're thinking, "Our waitress is the most more...
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are roaming in the forest when they come
across a lake. The water was enticing and Snow White decides to take a
bath.
She tells the Dwarfs to turn around while she is taking a bath in the lake.
The Dwarfs protest vehemently because they want to take a bath too. Snow
White relents and says, "When I get into the water and you hear the splash,
you can turn around."
Snow White undresses and as she is about to jump into water, at that very
moment, she is startled by a frog who jumps into water before she can. The
moment the Dwarfs hear the splash, they turn around and see Snow
White naked.
Now, given that this incident is an idea for a TV ad, what product is being
advertised?
Scroll down for the answer.
Scroll down for the answer.
Come on now, this should be easy for a person of your mental powers!
Keep scrolling down.
Seven Up
14 Things to do While Taking a Driver's Test1. Turn the radio on. When the tester goes to turn it off slap his/her hand. 2. Rev the car really high, turn to the tester, and say with an evil look, "buckle up!"3. Come dressed in a suit. Before the examiner gets in the car, ask him/her to put a piece of saran wrap down so he doesn't dirty the seat. 4. When the examiner tells you to stop, pop the hood clutch and say "oops". 5. Get in the car, look down at the pedals, and say, "now which one is the gas again?" 6. After the examiner gets in the car, pop the hood, and get out and check the oil. 7. Fill your car with beer bottles. 8. The whole time driving, talk about how Aunt Gertrude smells like mothballs. 9. Tell the Registrar that you are taking the remedial test. 10. In the middle of driving, put your arm around the examiner. 11. Swear at everybody on the road. 12. When you stop at a light, start revving the engine while looking back and forth between the more...
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are roaming in the forest when they come across a lake. The water was enticing and Snow White decides to take a bath. She tells the Dwarfs to turn around while she is taking a bath in the lake. The Dwarfs protest vehemently because they want to take a bath too.
Snow White relents and says, "When I get into the water and you hear the splash, you can turn around."
Snow White undresses and as she is about to jump into water, at that very moment, she is startled by a frog who jumps into water before she can. The moment the Dwarfs hear the splash, they turn around and see Snow White naked.
Now, given that this incident is an idea for a TV ad, what product is being advertised?
...
Scroll down for the answer.
...
Keep scrolling down for the answer.
...
Come on now, this should be easy for a person of your mental powers!
...
Keep scrolling down.
...
SEVEN UP!!!
When you get out of a restroom and turn left, your Canadian.
When you get out of the restroom and turn right, your American.
Q. What are you in the bathroom?
Answer down below.
A. European
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are roaming in the forest when they come across a lake. The water was enticing and Snow White decides to take a bath. So she tells the Dwarfs to turn around while she is taking a bath in the lake.
The Dwarfs protest vehemently because they want to take a bath too.
Snow White relents and says "When I get into the water and you hear the splash, you can turn around."
Snow White undresses and as she is about to jump into water, at that very moment, she is startled by a frog who jumps into water before she can.
The moment the Dwarfs hear the SPLASH, they turn around and see Snow White standing NAKED.
Now, given that this incident is an idea for a TV ad, what product is being advertised?
Scroll down for the answer.
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Come on now, this should be easy for a person of your mental more...
The teacher says, "Children, today I will ask each of you to come to the front of the class and use a word in a sentence. Today's word is' beautiful'. Little Sally, would you please come up here and use' beautiful' in a sentence?"
Little Sally walked to the front of the room, thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, my mom is the most beautiful woman in the world."
Teacher says, "Very good, Little Sally, you may sit. "Little Frankie, your turn."
Little Frankie walked to the front of the room, thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, the sunrise this morning was the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen."
Teacher says, "Very good, Little Frankie, you may sit. Little Johnny, it's your turn."
Little Johnnie walked to the front of the room, thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, last night my big sister told my dad that she was pregnant and he said,' Beautiful! Just more...