Unattended Jokes

A dumb list for dumb laws:
Australia
1. Children may not purchase cigarettes, but can smoke them.
2. You may never leave your car keys in an unattended vehicle.
3. It is illegal to roam the streets wearing black clothes, felt shoes and black shoe polish on your face as these items are the tools of a cat burglar.
England
1. Those wishing to use a television must apply for a license.
2. It is illegal to leave baggage unattended.
3. Picking up abandoned baggage is as act of terrorism.

A couple in Lawrence, MA were charged with criminal neglect after they left their dog unattended in the car in 90 degree heat.
But the dog wasn't really alone. Heidi Dreher and Kenneth Reader also left their two children, aged 4 and 5, in the car for at least half an hour while they negotiated a drug deal, police say.
Massachusetts law forbids people from leaving an animal unattended in a car but does not forbid the same treatment of children.
"As far as we know, child neglect is a civil matter that we don't get involved with," said a lawyer with the Essex County D.A.'s office.
Source: Boston Globe

Stay clear of the ejection port(s) both front and rear.
Beware of objects thrown from unit, both solid and liquid.
Please carry unit with care as handle placement is not optimum.
Use caution when dispensing fluids not to spill them on sensitive components of unit.
Do not drop unit as this may cause damage.
Do not submerge unit for extended periods of time.
Do not leave unit submerged while unattended as this may harm the unit.
Do not leave unit unattended in public places.
Do not expose unit to extreme temperatures.
Make sure to use proper approved restraints when transporting unit in a vehicle, i.e. no duct tape or string.
Make sure to fuel unit through proper opening.
Multiple units operating in close proximity may be hazardous to your health and mental well being.
Unit is delivered "as is" and may not be returned or exchanged. No warranty should be implied.
Software upgrades may be administered throughout the life of the more...