Village Jokes / Recent Jokes
In a village in South Africa, there was a young man who was what some people call a Casanova, good with the ladies. He had all kinds of ladies. He liked them all... fat ones, short ones, skinny ones, it didn't matter to him.
The trouble was that he had a true love, a virgin that he was saving for marriage. This innocent virgin, her name was Mary, knew nothing about sex. Of course, our Tiger of the Village wanted to keep things that way.
Eventually they were married and on the wedding night Mary was very impressed with sex. She told her new husband that she did not know a man was built that way. What a wonderful thing men had to please women.
Our Tiger didn't want her to think that all men were the same, so he told her, "I tell you something, Honey, I am the only man in the world with such a thing." She believed him!
Our Tiger of the Village was a sheep herder and had to go to the hills for weeks at a time. He had been gone for a couple of weeks, when he came more...
The American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large Yellowfin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied only a little while.
The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish? The Mexican said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs. The American then asked, but what do you do with the rest of your time?
The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life, senor."
The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds buy a bigger boat, with the proceeds from the bigger boat you more...
When a small Montana village decided to buy a new fire truck, the town council met to decide what to do with the old one. Randall, an old rancher, stood up. "Ah think we should keep the old truck," he said."We can use it for all them false alarms!"
The good doctor had been an inspiration to the jungle natives. He had cured their sick and taught them the religious and moral values of his own England. He was loved and respected by every native in the village, but on this particular afternoon the chief was obviously troubled as he entered the doctor's hut.
"You live among my people long time now," said the chief. "You tell us not right for man and girl to be close together before marriage and we believe what you say. This morning white child born to woman in village. You only white man in jungle. What I tell my people?"
The doctor smiled and led the chief to a window. "My son," he said, "I won't attempt to give you a full scientific explanation for the phenomenon known as an albino. But look at the flock of sheep upon that hill. Every one is snow white except one. The white baby born to the woman in your village means nothing more or less than that one black sheep in the white flock. It more...
Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
A small village was troubled by a man-eating lion. So its leaders senta message to the great hunter, Jonesie, to come and kill the beast.For several nights the hunter lay in wait for the lion, but it never appeared. Finally, he told the village chief to kill a cow and give himits hide. Draping the skin over his shoulders, he went to the pasture towait for the lion.In the middle of the night, the villagers woke to the sound of blood-curdling shrieks coming from the pasture. As they carefully approached, they saw the hunter on the ground, groaning in pain. There was no sign of the lion."What happened, Jonesie? Where is the lion?" asked the chief."Forget the damn lion!" he howled. "Which one of you idiots let the bull loose?"
The American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican
village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked.
Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and
asked how long it took to catch them.
The Mexican replied only a little while.
The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more
fish?
The Mexican said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs.
The American then asked, but what do you do with the rest of your time?
The Mexican fisherman said, I sleep late, fish a little, play with my
children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each
evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full
and busy life, senor.
The American scoffed, I am a Harvard MBA and could help you.
You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a more...