Waist Jokes / Recent Jokes
A man was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down.
"Grandpa, what are you doing?" he exclaimed.
The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him.
"Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again.
The old man slowly looked at him and said, "Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. ...This was your Grandma's idea."
Why is the space between a women's tits and hips called a waist?
Because you could put another pair of tits there.
Boy: "Miss, may I kiss you?"
Girl: "No."
Boy: "Could you let me embrace your waist with my arms?"
Girl: "No."
Boy: "Well, then, may I touch your hands?"
Girl: "No."
Boy: "Why do you keep saying 'No' all the time?"
Girl: "Mom said, when date with a boyfriend for the first time, remember to say No to everything."
Boy: "Oh, really? Your mom is so..., OK. Miss, do you mind I touch your hands?"
Girl: "No."
Boy: "Miss, do you mind if I embrace your waist with my arms? "
Girl: "No."
Boy: "Miss, do you mind I kiss you?"
Girl: "Er... No."
Editor's Note: It's dry parody. You gotta really like sci-fi to enjoy this one...
-------------------------------------------------------
Experiment 8 Postflight Summary
NASA publication 14-307-1792
-------------------------------------------------------
ABSTRACT
The purpose of this experiment was to prepare for the expected participation in long-term space based research by husband-wife teams once the US space station is in place. To this end, the investigators explored a number of possible approaches to continued marital relations in the zero-G orbital environment provided by the XXXXXX shuttle mission.
Our primary conclusion is that satisfactory marital relations are within the realm of possibility in zero-G, but that many couples would have difficulty getting used to the approaches we found to be most satisfactory.
-------------------------------------------------------
INTRODUCTION
The more...
It was a hot day and a Hollywood star told a visiting Asian actor he knew of a secluded place where they can go skinny dipping. While they were enjoying the cool water, a busload of women suddenly appeared. Both men made a beeline for their towels. The Hollywood star wrapped his towel around his waist, while the Asian actor wrapped his towel around his head. There was a great deal of laughter coming from the women. They were hysterical. Afterwards, when there was only the two of them, the Hollywood star asked his guest why he wrap his towel around his head, instead of around his waist and he replied, Where I come from we identify with our faces.
A bad person dies and is greeted by Saint Peter. Peter tells the man he must choose between three hells.
The first hell is very hot and he sees a lot of people burning in fire. The next hell is freezing cold and he sees people shivering and clamoring. In the third hell, he sees people standing in shit up to their waist but they look quite happy. They are drinking a cup of coffee and are chatting with each other. So the bad person says to Peter, "I choose the third hell with all the people standing in shit up to their waist."
So Peter admits the bad person to the third hell. He gets a cup of coffee and feels quite comfortable. Suddenly he hears a beep from a loud speaker that says, "Attention. Attention. Coffee break is over. It's time to stand on your head now."
A man was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down. "Grandpa, what are you doing?" he exclaimed. The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him. "Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" heasked again. The old man slyly looked at him and said, "Well, last week I sat out herewith no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This was your Grandma's idea!"