Wash Jokes / Recent Jokes
Why Beer is Better than Women1. YOU CAN ENJOY A BEER ALL MONTH LONG.2. BEER STAINS WASH OUT.3. YOU DON'T HAVE TO WINE AND DINE BEER.4. YOUR BEER WILL ALWAYS WAIT PATIENTLY FOR YOU IN THE CAR WHILE YOU PLAY FOOTBALL.5. WHEN YOUR BEER GOES FLAT, YOU TOSS IT OUT.6. BEER IS NEVER LATE.7. A BEER DOESN'T GET JEALOUS WHEN YOU GRAB ANOTHER BEER.8. HANGOVERS GO AWAY.9. BEER LABELS COME OFF WITHOUT A FIGHT.10. WHEN YOU GO TO A BAR, YOU KNOW YOU CAN ALWAYS PICK UP A BEER.11. BEER NEVER HAS A HEADACHE.12. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DRIVE A BEER HOME IN THE MORNING.13. A BEER WON'T GET UPSET IF YOU COME HOME WITH ANOTHER BEER.14. IF YOU POUR A BEER RIGHT, YOU'LL ALWAYS GET GOOD HEAD.15. A BEER ALWAYS GOES DOWN EASY.16. YOU CAN HAVE MORE THAN ONE BEER IN A NIGHT AND NOT FEEL GUILTY.17. YOU CAN SHARE A BEER WITH YOUR FRIENDS.18. YOU ALWAYS KNOW YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE TO POP A BEER.19. BEER IS ALWAYS WET.20. BEER DOESN'T DEMAND EQUALITY.21. YOU CAN HAVE A BEER IN PUBLIC.22. A BEER DOESN'T CARE WHEN YOU COME.23. more...
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: How do blonde braincells die?
A: Alone.
Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.
Q: How does a blonde part their hair?
A: (Action of scissoring legs apart)
Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A: Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Q: What was the blond psychic's greatest achievment?
A: An IN-body experience!
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
A: After a dye job.
Q: Why is the blonde's brain the size of a pea in the morning?
A: It swells at night.
Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?
A1: She'd just dyed her hair.
A2: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown more...
You have ever had to stop at a car wash on the way to a funeral to wash the dump dirt from the back of your pickup so you can use it as a flower truck.
Your clawfoot bathtub has ever been unusable because your wife was using it as a brooder.
Your clawfoot bathtub sometimes serves as a hospital for injured fowl.
Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A: Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink? A: Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Introduction To Common Household Objects I - The Mop
Introduction To Common Household Objects II - The Sponge
Dressing Up - Beyond The Funeral And The Wedding
Refrigerator Forensics - Identifying And Removing The Dead
Design Pattern Or Splatter Stain On The Linoleum - You CAN Tell the Difference
Accepting Loss I - If It's Empty, You Can Throw It Away
Accepting Loss II - If The Milk Expired Three Weeks Ago, Keeping It In The Refrigerator Won't Bring It Back
Going To The Supermarket - It's Not Just For Women Anymore
Recycling Skills I - Boxes That The Electronics Came In
Recycling Skills II - Styrofoam That Came In The Boxes That The Electronics Came In
Bathroom Etiquette I - How To Remove Beard/Mustache Clippings From The Sink
Bathroom Etiquette II - Let's Wash Those Towels!
Bathroom Etiquette III - Five Easy Ways To Tell When You're About To Run Out Of Toilet Paper
Giving Back To The Community - How To Donate 15 Year Old Elvis To The more...
A young boy, about seven years old, was at the corner grocery picking out a box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do.
“No laundry” the boy said, “I’m going to wash my dog. ”
“But you shouldn’t use this to wash your dog. It’s very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he’ll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him. ”
But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog.
About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing.
“Oh, he died, ” the boy said.
The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the dog died but added, “I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog. ”
The boy replied, “I don’t think it was the detergent that killed him. more...