Weak Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: Why don't Jewish mothers drink?
A: Alcohol interferes with their suffering.
Q: Have you seen the newest Jewish-American Princess horror movie?
A: It's called "Debbie Does Dishes".
Q: Why do Jewish Mothers make great parole officers?
A: They never let anyone finish a sentence.
Q: What's a Jewish American Princess' favorite position?
A: Facing Bloomingdale's
When the doctor called Mrs. Liebenbaum to tell her that her check came back, she replied, "So did my arthritis."
A man calls his mother in Florida. "Mom, how are you?"
"Not too good,"says the mother. "I've been very weak."
The son says, "Why are you so weak?"
She says, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."
The man says, "That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?
The mother answers, "Because I didn't want my mouth filled with food if you called."
A Jewish boy comes home from more...

A man called his mother in Florida. "Mom, how are you?""Not too good," said the mother. "I've been very weak."The son said, "Why are you so weak?"She said, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."The man said, "That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?"The mother answers, "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call."

Teacher: Your History Exercise Was Very Bad, Johnny, So I Told You To Write It 20 Times. But You Have Done It Only 10 Times? Student: Teacher-My Maths Is Also Very Weak.

A man calls his mother in Florida. "Mom, how are you?" "Not too
good", says the mother. "I've been very weak."
The son says, "Why are you so weak?" She says, "Because I haven't
eaten in 38 days." The man says, "That's terrible! Why haven't you eaten
in 38 days?"
The mother answers, "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with
food if you should call."

If you think being meek is weak, try being meek for a week.

The following circulated among us MEN in the Army - just goes to show that we didn’t take ourselves TOO serious:
I am the Infantry, Queen of Battle! I sit tight, stoned out of my squach while my country’s representatives meet the enemy face-to-face and will-to-will across the peace table. For two centuries I have been the weak link in our nation’s defense, I am the Infantry! Follow Me?
Both easy victories and well-covered-up defeats I have known. Frankly, I owe a lot to friendly historians.
In the Revolution I spent most of my time slinking around out of uniform taking potshots at British troops from behind rocks. I invaded Canada, and even that was a failure. My best general went over the the British. For a while there I didn’t know whether to shit or wind my watch, but the French navy pulled my chestnuts out of the fire.
I took on Britain again in 1812 thinking she’d be too busy with Napoleon to notice. I invaded Canada again and got beaten again. On my more...