Whisper Jokes / Recent Jokes
A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee."
The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church.
So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'"
The following Sunday, the little boy went to church with his father and during the service said to his father, "Daddy, I have to whisper."
The father looked at him and said, "Okay, why don't you whisper in my ear."
Little Johnny and his mother were on a train. Johnny leant over and started to whisper in his mothers ear. Johnny, how many times have I told you, said his mother, its rude to whisper. If you have something to say, say it out loud. OK, said Johnny, why does the lady over there look like an ugly, haggard old witch?
A business man urgently needed to talk to his star employee so he called him at home on a Saturday. He was very surprised when the phone was answered before the first ring was even complete. A small boy's voice whispered on the other end:"Hello?"
"Is your father at home?"
"Yes," the boy whispered.
"Can I speak to him?"
"No, he's busy."
"Is your mom home?"
"Yes"
"Can I talk to her?"
"No," the voice said still in a whisper.
"Is there anyone else there?"
"Yes," the boy whispered, "The fireman and the policeman, but they're busy talking to mom and dad."
The man was getting frustrated now, but he heard a loud noise on the other end of the line. "What's that noise"
The little boy replied in an awed whisper: "It's a helicopter! They're landing a helicopter on our lawn."
Angrily the man shouted more...
One Sunday morning, a little boy goes to church with his mom. While sitting in the service, he looks up at his mom and says, "Mommy, I have to pee, Mommy, I have to pee!!"
His mom replies, "Johnny, it's not polite to say pee in church. From now on, when you have to pee, say 'you have to whisper'."
The following Sunday, the boy is sitting in church with his dad and the urge to go comes to him. He looks up at his dad and says, "Daddy, I have to whisper."
"Alright, son," his father says, "right here in my ear!"
Once upon a time a four-year old boy was visiting his aunt and uncle. He was a very outspoken little boy and often had to be censured to say the right thing at the right time. One day at lunch, when the aunt had company, the little boy said, "Auntie, I want to tinkle." Auntie took the little boy aside and said, "Never say that, Sonny. If you want to tinkle, say "I want to whisper." The incident was forgotten.
That night when Uncle and Auntie were soundly sleeping, the little boy climbed into bed with them. He tugged at his uncle's shoulder and said, "Uncle, I want to whisper."
Uncle said, "All right, Sonny, don't wake Auntie up. Whisper in my ear."
The little boy was sent back to his parents the next day.
Pommy falla, Ozzy falla, and Maori falla, all ex SAS. Drinking at local RSL, straight whiskeys from a schooner. Six hours later the three of them disappear for a piss and return without anyone noticing. One hour later the pom leans over and whispers to his mates "you know us English are the elite of all SAS regiments" Ozzy falla whispers back 'bugger off mate its us ozzies " Maori falla while taking another drink " Oh, eh!"
Pommy falla " I'll prove it then watch' Pommy falla goes up to the bar and chats to the barman comes back and sits down.
The barman arrives a coupla minutes later with a large towel, face cloth, and large kitchen knife. He spreads the large towel over the table, hands the face cloth to the Ozzy and gives the knife to the Pom
The pom puts his hand on the towel raises the knife and bang cuts off his little finger. "Thats how tough our English SAS are he whispers" The Ozzy wipes the poms cut finger with the face more...