Wind Jokes / Recent Jokes
The bandage was wound around the wound.
The farm was used to produce produce.
The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse
We must polish the Polish furniture.
He could lead if he would get the lead out.
The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
I did not object to the object.
The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
They were too close to the door to close it.
The buck does funny things when the does are present.
A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
After a number of injections my jaw got number.
Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a more...
What type of wind is named after Santa Claus's warm climate cousin? Santa Ana
Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same as the words "the" and "rapist" put together?
Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another?
On a telephone, why does ABC start on the number 2 and not 1?
Do pigs pull ham strings?
Do dumped farmers get John Deere letters?
Why do radio operators say "niner" instead of just "nine"?
Why do people say heads up when you should duck?
Why did Superman wear his briefs on the outside of his tights?
Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone?
Why do they call the clock where you punch your time card called a "time" clock? Aren't all clocks "time" clocks?
Why does blow and suck mean the same thing when we describe something being crap?
Can dogs have dog days?
When a male is elected president and his wife is called the First Lady. What would a lady's husband be called if she were elected president?
If more...
Once upon a time, in the Christmas Tree Forest there lived the
Christmas fairies. They spent most of their time practising
sitting on top of the Christmas trees. There was just one rule
they had to stick to... it was strictly forbidden for a fairy to
kiss anyone! The trouble was that Floella was a wicked little fairy. One day
Harry the Hare was hopping through the forest when he saw Floella
sitting on top of a toadstool, combing her hair. Floella said,
"Hello, handsome, give us a kiss!"
Harry the Hare was shocked. "Father Christmas doesn't allow that!"
he gasped. "Anyone caught kissing a fairy will be turned straight
away into Goon!"
But Floella tickled his ears - just the way hares love and
whispered, "Don't worry, we won't get caught!"
Harry the Hare trembled with fear and excitement. He looked
carefully over his furry brown shoulder, saw that no one more...
In related news, a developer said a proposed wind farm site near DC is too windy because of its proximity to Joe Biden.
Just outside of Wichita, a 21-year old farm boy was driving a grain
harvester across his winter wheat field to collect the crop. This particular piece of farm equipment has huge rotating blades that cut down the wheat stalks. At some point during the harvesting, the driver's cowboy hat was blown off by the wind and hurtled some distance in front of the blades.
Thinking that the tractor was not moving fast enough to warrant stopping -- or perhaps just not thinking at all -- he jumped down and ran in front of the tractor to collect his hat. It was still being blown around by the wind, and after chasing it for a bit, he finally caught up with it. Meanwhile, the harvester had caught up with him, and his body was found scattered across the wheat field.
Local authorities were contacted by a neighbor who noticed the tractor crossing Highway 96 with no driver.
Verbs
Anal Salute
backfire
bake breeze biscuits
bake brownies
bark
bend a valve
Beep your horn
Blast the chair
blow dirt
blow dust
blow a fart
blow a gasket
blow kisses
blow mud
blow smoke
Blow the big brown horn
blow the sparkplugs
blurt
boff
Bottom blast
Bottom burp
boom-boom
break the seam
break wind
buang angin
bust ass
Buttock bassoon
Butt burp
Butt tuba
butt yodeling
chemold
clear one's throat
cleft a boofer
colon bowlin'
cook eggs
couper le fromage
crack ass
crepitate
crop dusting
cut a gasser
cut a melon
cut chedder
cut muffins
cut one
cut the cheese
cut the provolone
Cut a stinker
Cut the wind
deal one
degas
dot'dot
draw mud from the bottom of the pond
drop ass
Drop a bomb
drop a cookie
drop a fart
drop a ringo
drop a rose
drop one
drop more...