Wits Jokes / Recent Jokes

Kudzu is green, my dog's name is Blue And I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you. Yore hair is like cornsilk, a-flapping in the breeze. Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas. You move like the bass, which excite me in May. You ain't got no scales, but I luv you anyway. You're as graceful as okry, jist a-dancin' in the pan. Yo're as fragrant as SunDrop right out of the can. You have all yore teeth, for which I am proud I hold my head high when we're in a crowd. On special occasions, when you shave yore armpits, Well, I'm in hawg heaven, I'm plumb outta my wits. And speakin' of wits, you've got plenty fer shore. 'Cuz you married me back in '74. Still them fellers at work they all want to know, What I did to deserve such a purty, young doe. Like a good roll of duct tape, yo're there fer yore man, To patch up life's troubles and stick 'em in the can. Yo're as strong as a four-wheeler racin' through the mud, Yet fragile as that sanger named Naomi Judd. Yo're as cute as a more...

Kudzu is green, my dog's name is Blue And I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair is like cornsilk, a-flapping in the breeze. Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.
You move like the bass, which excite me in May. You ain't got no scales, but I luv you anyway.
You're as graceful as okry, jist a-dancin' in the pan. Yo're as fragrant as SunDrop right out of the can.
You have all yore teeth, for which I am proud; I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions, when you shave yore armpits, Well, I'm in hawg heaven, I'm plumb outta my wits.
And speakin' of wits, you've got plenty fer shore. 'Cuz you married me back in '74.
Still them fellers at work they all want to know, What I did to deserve such a purty, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape, yo're there fer yore man, To patch up life's troubles and stick 'em in the can.
Yo're as strong as a four-wheeler racin' through the mud, Yet fragile as that sanger named more...

A group of friends who prided themselves on their IQ (maybe MENSA members) set out to have a contest of wits. Each person in turn
asked a question and anyone who volunteered an answer that was wrong dropped out. If no one could answer, the questioner himself had to answer and if he was wrong, he dropped out. Each dropout had to put $5 into the pot.Eventually the contenders left were Thompson and Brown, matching erudition for erudition for a good half hour.Finally Thompson said, "How does a gopher dig a hole without leaving a mound of sand at the lip?"Brown thought about that and said, "I can't answer that. However, since it's your question, you had better answer it."Thompson said coolly, as he reached for the accumulated pile of bills, "Easy. The gopher starts at the bottom of the hole and that's where he leaves the sand.""Hold on," said Brown heatedly, grasping Thompson's wrist to prevent him from taking the pot. "How does the gopher more...