Worms Jokes / Recent Jokes

Did you ever think, when a hearse rolls by,
That you may be the next to die?
They wrap you up in a nice clean sheet,
And drop you down about six feet deep.
All goes well for about a week,
And then your coffin begins to leak.
The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out,
The worms play pinnacle on you snout.
They eat your clothes, they eat your hat,
They crawl in skinny and crawl out fat!

How many worms does it take to screw in a light bulb?
What kind of an idiot thinks worms can screw in light bulbs?!

Joe's chemistry teacher wanted to teach his ninth grade class a lesson on the evils of liquor so he produced a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.

"Observe" he told his class as he began to put one of the worms in the glass of water. This worm swam about freely and looked as happy as can be. He then put the second worm in the glass of whiskey and it to swam about for a moment but then started to shake and fell to the bottom dead.

"Now" he asked "What lesson can we learn from this experiment?"

"That's easy," replied Joe. "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

The lady golfer was a determined, if not very proficient player. At each swipe she made at the ball, earth flew in all directions.
"Gracious me," she exclaimed red-faced to her caddie, "the worms will think there's an earthquake."
"I don't know," replied the caddie, "the worms round here are very clever. I'll bet most of them are hiding underneath the ball for safety."

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of alcohol, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey and two worms.
"Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.
The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.
"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.
Little Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded...
"Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of alcohol, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey and two worms."Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail."Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.Little Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded..."Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.
"Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be. The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.
"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.
Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms."