Yust Jokes

Ole and Lena were applying for a wedding license and were answering questions asked by the clerk. "Lena, how old are you?"
Lena answered, "I am going to be tventy one in Yanuary."
Next the clerk asked, "Lena, how tall are you?" Lena stated, "I'm yust about six feet tall."
"And how much do you weigh, Lena?" was the next question. "I weigh yust about 230 pounds."
"Wow," exclaimed the clerk, "You're big enough to play with the Green Bay Packers!!"
"Oh no," answered Lena, "I yust play with Ole's packer."

Sven & Ole, a couple of Norwegians now living in Minnesota, head for the fair in Duluth. The first thing to catch Sven's eye is the big double Ferris wheel.
"Oh, Ole," he says, "vould you look at dat. I've always vanted to go on von of dose big Ferris veels. Let's go ride on dat von."
Ole, not being near as adventurous as Sven says, "Oh, I don't tink so. Dat looks kind of dangerous to me." "Vell," says Sven, "you give me yust von good reason vhy you von't go vit me on dat ride."
Ole couldn't come up with a good reason so up they went. Ole had to admit after the ride that it was kind of fun.
After another 10 or 15 minutes they came to the roller coaster. "Oh Ole," says Sven, "Vould you look at dat. Dat's von fine looking roller coaster. I tink ve should go for a ride' on dat."
"Oh, I don't tink so." says Ole. "Dat looks very dangerous to me."
"Vell," says Sven. more...