Zebra Jokes / Recent Jokes
A biologist, a statistician, a mathematician and a computer scientist are on a photo-safari in africa. They drive out on the savannah in their jeep, stop and scout the horizon with their binoculars.
The biologist: "Look! There's a herd of zebras! And there, in the middle: A white zebra! It's fantastic! There are white zebra's! We'll be famous!"
The statistician: "It's not significant. We only know there's one white zebra."
The mathematician: "Actually, we only know there exists a zebra, which is white on one side."
The computer scientist: "Oh, no! A special case!"
Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white
stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't
know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did
and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other
zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are
what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black
stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."
One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one raises their hand. The teacher says, “See it’s long neck? What animal has a long neck? ” Sally holds up her hand and asks “is it a giraffe? ” “Very good Sally, ” the teacher replies. Next she holds up a picture of a zebra. None of the students holds up their hands. “See the stripes on this animal? What animal has stripes? ” Billy holds up his hand and says, “It’s a zebra. ” “Very good Billy, ” the teacher replies. Next she holds up a picture of a deer. None of the students recognized the animal. “See the big antlers on this animal. What animal has horns like this? ” Still no one guesses. “Let me give you another hint, it’s something your mother calls your father. ” Little Johnny shouts out, “Is it a horny bastard? ”
The forgien exchanged students Jose, Doron, and Krono didn't know any English. So their teacher asked them to go find some words.
Jose goes to the airport and sees a plane.
"Waz dat?" he asks.
"That's a plane taking off," the pilot said.
"Take off!" he says.
Doron goes to the zoo and sees a zebra.
"Waz dat?" he asks.
"That's a zebra," a lady tells him.
"Ze'bra!" he says.
Krono goes to the hospital and sees a new baby.
"Waz dat?" he asks.
"That's my baby," the mother said.
"Be'be!" he says.
The next day in class, they say all the words together.
"Take off ze bra bebe!!"
there this french guy and theres this girl and she said you have to at lest now 3 words in english so there at the airport and he heard take-off so thats one word he said to him self so they went to the zoo and he heard baby zebra so thats 3 words he gos the the girl and he said the word take off z bra baby
A zebra dies goes to heaven. When checking in, he tells St. Peter,
"Say, I have always wanted to know if I am white with black stripes or black with white stripes."
St. Peter, "I can't answer that question...but see God walking around over there? Ask him."
Zebra to God, "God, am I white with black stripes or black with white stripes?"
God looks at the zebra sagely and states, "You are what you are."
Frustrated, the zebra returns to St. Peter.
What did He say," asks S.P.
"Oh,," replies the zebra. "He just said, 'You are what you are,' and I still don't know whether I'm black with white stripes or white with black stripes."
"Oh, that's easy," says S.P. "You are white with black stripes."
"How do you know?" asks the zebra. "Well," says S.P., "if you were black with white stripes he would have said 'you is what you is.'"