"50 Ways to Appreciate Life" joke

1. Watch the sunset- on a sled.2. Smile more, -it might get you a free beer.3. Complain less. -It might get you a free beer.4. Surprise a friend with a call. - It might get you a free beer.5. Develop your gifts. - You might need them.6. Count your blessings. - You might need these too! 7. Talk to someone in an elevator. - Particularly ones with Arctic Cat jackets on, or those carrying beer.8. Breathe consciously once in a while. - This cures snoring.9. Enjoy sneezes - and stay behind the one sneezing.10. Appreciate that your leg isn't broken, - unless you are an actor.11. Be unique, -it demonstrates difference! 12. Sing in the shower. - With a friend! 13. Put your shoes on the wrong feet and laugh at yourself, - or have someone laugh at you.14. Make someone's day, - or night.15. Stand on your head. - For a free beer! 16. Stare at the world above you. - Hopefully not from under a bar.17. Play with an animal. - Be sure it is one which cannot eat you! 18. Slurp Jell-O. -Add Vodka for flavor.19. Do something unplanned. - Plan to do it this weekend! 20. Plan to do something and have it go as planned. - This is hard! 21. Stand back and look in. - Tell my wife this when shopping all the time.22. Appreciate a paradox - paradox a appreciate.23. Dive in. - Naked! 24. Get grass stains. - Naked :)25. Wave your hands in the air.- Use the middle finger at birds.26. Swim with the fishes. - Again, naked.27. Make maple syrup. - Don't use pine juice.28. Climb a tree. -Don't climb a pine.29. Spin in a circle once while walking to class. - Don't fall in a mud puddle.30. Tell someone they look nice. - You look nice.31. Collect something, - like taxes from the tax collector! 32. Walk barefoot every chance you get. - Even in the snow! 33. Build a sand castle, - or a snowman.34. Walk with no destination. - Talk with no destination.35. When all your exams are done, treat yourself to an ice cream cone. - OK I WILL! Then a beer.36. Entertain yourself by making faces. - bend over and see if they look the same.37. Don't just listen, try to hear. -Then try to listen to a friend.38. Wear shoes until they're so old they won't stay on your feet. -Then wear them swimming.39. Appreciate the primary colors. - Know them! 40. When you wake up, realize you're alive. - Promise not to use vulgarities.41. Walk in the rain, - with a bar of soap.42. Blow bubbles, - in the tub! 43. Make the most of where you are. - Ride an Arctic Cat! 44. Jump as high as you can. - Come down on an empty beer can, and recycle it.45. Dance - in bed46. Talk less and say more. -Carry a BIG stick.47. Exercise before you diet. - 12 oz. curls don't count do they? 48. Learn to play chess. - That and Linear Algebra may come in handy.49. Sit by a river. - With a beer, on an Arctic Cat.50. Never lose your sense of humor. - You will need it!

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